God-Fraud, Nithyananda Dragged Back to Bangalore, Stalls & Calls Nurses for Room Service

Nithyananda's Transformation Blueprint: From Fraud to Fugitive to Faker to Furlough to Freedom
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. Boy, you look a bit stressed, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. We bet that you could use a little R&R to recoup and recharge yourself. We know just the place, a nice little sleepy town in the foothills of the Himalayan Mountains in Himachal Pradesh. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, will just love it. This time of year, it is so nice. Spring, birds, fresh air... and no one around to bother you... why there's even all the modern amenities such as wireless internet and cell phone coverage. Oh, my gosh! We're so sorry, 'Swami' Nithyananda. We forgot that you were busted because the CID Team was able to trace your phone number. Who do you, 'Paramahamsa' think gave them such confidential information? Sri Nithyananda, did you use this same phone to try to intimidate all those donors who recently left you after they lost their life savings to build your empire? Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we agree. Those 'ungrateful' people are still stuck in the greed factor. Just imagine, they lost their lifesavings, and they got some strong words from you that no doubt, helped remove their ego. And, just because of that, look what happens. They probably were willing to call up the CID Team or even pass your cell number on to our friend, Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald, who probably then passed it on to the CID Team. Wow, we guess that how news travels.

'Swami' Nithyananda, it looks like your whole house has fallen on you. Just like this classic picture from the Wizard of Oz:

No, No, No, Sri Nithyananda. That is not Ma Medhananda Mayi under that house. She is still running loose out in the West, Seattle to be exact. That definitely isn't her. We hate to tell you this, actually, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that is you stuck under there with your smelly feet exposed. You're in the East now... and well, you seemed to be crushed by the house you built. But, don't worry, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, unless someone tents the house and fumigate, we imagine that you will be able to borrow down and slither out sometime before next winter.

For the record, 'Swami' Nithyananda, let's review all of the charges that have been leveled against you, shall we?:

• Two cases under Sections 295A (deliberate and malicious acts, intended to outrage religious feelings of any class by insulting its religion or religious beliefs)
• 376 (punishment for rape)
• 377 (unnatural sex)
• 420 (cheating and dishonestly inducing delivery of property)
• 506 (criminal intimidation) 
• 120B (criminal conspiracy) of IPC

That's quite a collection, 'Swami' Nithyananda. Will your threatening kal bhairava emails on your confiscated computers will show up on this list? We've already reported your threats to the FBI. Just a tip from us, next time in your 10-page sex contract, be sure to include a phrase about not being married and 'available'. That might help you look like a legitimate sex-craved sanyasi (renunciant). So, where do all the other charges fit it?  Let's see there's gold smuggling, excess foreign funds on hand (just a weekend supply, no doubt), more illegal forest products including tiger skins. Say, you go all out for your room service ladies.  Were those skins for your meditation or for more 'experiments'?  We agree, 'Swami' Nithyananda.  Nothing like a hot room service lady on a tiger skin. Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, those new findings are not exactly extremely serious criminal acts. Small time stuff, like that of a petty criminal. But, we're sure that everyone knows that you did the violent crimes above, so the authorities will be able to keep you at bay until they get the evidence they need. Those crimes above should do the trick.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, to be honest, we were a bit disappointed with your arrest. We were expecting to see you sporting handcuffs. You know, without handcuffs, you might have been able to escape from the authorities and continue your YouTube career. But, looks like the tables were turned. Instead of giving them the slip, someone gave you the slipper. Did they do this because, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, had no sole? OK, we realized that was a low shot, but it was the thought that counted.

More seriously, 'Swami' Nithyananda, Foreign Exchange Management Act (FEMA) and notify the Enforcement Directorate (ED). For all the laundering you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda did, you sure didn't have a clean act. In fact, take a look at you as you were arrested:

photo source: www.daijiworld.com

Sri Nithyananda, your hair looks greasy, you're unshaved, your saffron cloth is wrinkled, and looks like you haven't slept all night. Why 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you look just like an ashramite! Welcome to our world, when we were brainwashed slaves of course. Is this your karma coming around? Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, let's hope not. Let's pray that the police don't break canes over your head and throw furniture on you like you did to your ashramites to beat them into a brainwashed submission. That would be very cruel.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we heard the CID team was very nice to you. In fact, they even cleaned and fixed the toilet in your 8' by 5' cell. Wow nice of them. Perhaps that preparation was for their benefit, though. They must have watched your YouTube channel and knew that if that 'content' couldn't be flushed down and then the stench got into their air conditioning unit, it would be torture for them. We're beginning to catch on to their logic in receiving you, Sri Nithyananda. And, we understand, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that the CID Team went out of their way to make your feel at home. Why they even installed a little camera and a one-way mirror. But, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, don't get too excited. This isn't going to be the type of bar and grill you're used to. Quite different, we're sure.

And, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is your little cell nice and clean? Is the mattress they slip in during nap hours to your standards? We hope that everything is to your liking, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Just imagine that if there were head lice that infested your hair, then they would have to shave [hint, hint] everything off, well maybe not everything. Wow, Sri Nithyananda, we bet if they shaved your head, then you would look just like a common criminal, exactly like Bhaktananda. By the way, how is he? Oh, that's right, we heard that he's no longer in the air-conditioned lock up but in jail for a couple of weeks. That ought to cool him off, or will it? Anyway, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if they do shave your head like Bhaktananda, do you think we'll be able to see that little birthmark that looks like a '9-9-9' symbol upside down! And, if you didn't have that birthmark, then do you think that at least one of the good-natured interrogators would be willing to tattoo that symbol on you just for authenticity?

Wait a minute, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there's smoke coming from our computer and sulfur fumes belching out. Yuck. Disgusting. Look, an email from The Devil! And, the email is written in crimson blood. Boy, we didn't know that it was possible to send an email written in blood, but here it is:

Dear Blog Owner,

Sorry to say that I am very offended by your humor.  Please note, as the caretaker of pure evil, I want you to be aware that Nithyananda Swami does not meet my already very low standards.  Just like Osho, I don't claim to be anything that I'm not.  In this way, Nithyananda Swami, has tried to hide all of his shame behind a veneer of holiness.  Nithyananda Swami is undeserving to be associated with our registered up-side-down 9-9-9™ symbol. Any further violations of our Registered Trademark, and I will make sure that the search engine ranking for this site sinks to the bowels of Nithyananda's abode.  Have a nice day.

Yours cordially,  The Devil

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we've gotten all kinds of threats from all kinds of characters, but this was the first time that The Devil has threaten us. We guess that even The Devil will have to go to the back of an already very long line if he wants to sue us or do anything to stop us. Sorry, no special treatment; not even for your peers, Sri Nithyananda. But, wait a minute, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what's this criticism here?:

"Only a house-holder is entitled for tantric sex. Claiming to be a monk and using so many people for one's pleasure is unpardonable,"

"(Nithyananda) has violated UNAIDS guidelines as well as the rules of tantra."

“He (Nithyananda) should have had one partner and announced himself as a tantric guru. It has caused damage to the faith of people in the institution and traumatized many.”

Who said that, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? Oh, that was Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. Wait at minute, that makes two devils in one day!  It was bad enough that The Devil condemns you, but when you have a truly evil, cult personality and renown closet womanizer, like Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, come out and publicly denounce you, then you know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you really need to get your marketing team in overdrive. Otherwise, donations are going to dry up into the bottomless pit you seemed to dig for yourself in, and then you'll have no choice but to sell your ashram and other assets to Sri Sri at a fire and brimstone sale rate. Scandalous.

So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, how are you going to recover from this setback? Oh, we see, you're going to start a campaign to have everyone recite a mantra for your acquittal. How enchanting.  And, you're actually going to lead by example. How innovative.  We're not used initiative from you, Sri Nithyananda. Which mantra are you going to use? Oh, yes, your standard house mantra:

Om Hrim Nithyananda

But, wait a minute, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there are only about sixty people in the world that are still willing to say that mantra. But, don't worry, 'Swami' Nithyananda; there's close to six million people still willing to chant for you. But, Sri Nithyananda, you'll have to modify your mantra just a bit. Don't worry, it will still be close to your original mantra, but just slightly different. Here it is:

Om H-Ream it up your backside, Nithyananda

Since you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, seem so at ease changing sacred mantras to substitute your name, we knew that you wouldn't mind this slight alteration. It kind of makes it a little more joyful to say. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, should give it try. We would like to see you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, smile again. Honest. It gives us great joy to imagine the CID Team telling you again and again to wipe that stupid smirk off your face. Oh, don't cry on us. Boo Hoo. Really Sri Nithyananda, we've seen crocodiles with more sincerity.

Just think, Sri Nithyananda, in a two days, you'll be back on that 24(K) golden throne in your ashram waiting for a nice afternoon massage on your bed without any more surveillance cameras. Of course, with Bhaktananda in jail, you might have to give yourself that massage, but we know you'll manage somehow. So, just forty-eight hours of CID interrogation. That should be easy for you. In your book, Formless in Form, page 44, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, mentioned how you withstood days of doing the panchtapas (fire meditation), that in your own words:

"So extreme was this penance that none but the most courageous even attempted it."

And, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda go on to say how you were surrounded and went down, down, down, in ring a fire... and the flames got higher (just like Johny Cash) and placed a pot of smoldering embers on your head to boot. Wow! That must have been tough. And, then just to make sure you could outdo Clint Eastwood, in the same book you mention about doing the 'dreaded' traatak mediation where you would stare at the sun all day long without blinking. So, the withstanding the rigors of talking to a few non-brainwashed souls that do not carry your certificates of 'enlightenment' especially after being cooped in with the likes of Bhaktananda, should be a piece of cake.

So, what is this? Chest pain? Are you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, trying to say that the CID Team put the squeeze on your chest? We all know that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda were very good at doing that do others, especially after watching those videos. Is this part those karmic returns? If you really had chest pains, why weren't you able to heal them?  After all, in Formless in Form on page 44, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, talk about how you broke your back on a truck ride in an army truck from Tapovan, and how you healed your back with your own hands to the amazement of the doctors. 'Swami' Nithyananda, did you heal your back, but forgot to heal your spine? We don't understand. After all, in all your books, you included the article of "A Mind of a Mystic" which included all of those test results from some doctors in Oklahoma in 2005.  From this study, you, Sri Nithyananda clinically 'proved' your ability to control your brainwaves from the results indicated from Positron Emission Tomography (PET) device. The gushing doctor talked about how you effortlessly moved into the 'pleasure zone' by simply meditating at will:

"I believe the PET scan revealed what I call the brain's 'D-spot'. Whether you consider the 'D' in D-spot to stand for Delight, the Divine or even Dopamine (the chemical through which our bodies experience pleasure), initial indications are that the meditation can stimulate it."

So, Sri Nithyananda, why then did the medical results for your chest pains come back as 'negative'? Weren't you able to heal yourself? 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, were you faking it because all those chats with CID Officers were too much for you and it made you cry? Really? 'Swami' Nithyananda, where did you learn this behavior? I couldn't have been from any of your room service ladies. We doubt that any of them ever said, "Not tonight dear, I have a headache." So, where did you learn this? Oh, yes, one of our loyal readers gave a plausible explanation that you learned this from watching TV while, you, Sri Nithyananda, would go into samadhi (trance) and do tantric 'experiments', while you were not feeling well, of course. Yes, if you weren't watching TV, it would have just seemed like regular sex. But, now we know that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda were really not that interested in the sex, so you must have watched TV in a way to unclutch your mind while distributing all of that tantric energy. Anyway, Sri Nithyananda, next time you do this type of healing meditation, we suggest that you watch some educational television, instead of those cheap crime thrillers. After all, James Cagney as well as tips from Cosmopolitan [source:IBN-Live] are not the ideal roll model for a real genuine 'parmahamsa'.

OK, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we'll give you the benefit of the doubt.  So, let's just assume that you weren't faking it. Just the same, we're still confused, Sri Nithyananda. If you're able to heal yourself, quickly get into the 'pleasure zone', and can stand the rigors of the toughest of tapas (penance meditations), then why did you still go to the hospital? Now we get it; room service ladies in nurse's outfits. Yes, that makes sense. Did they take your temperature with a banana? Well, they should have and filmed it too. That way, you would have had visual to show everybody if you ever try to tell that joke again. Sorry, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we hate to bust your fantasy, but as you probably found out, real nurses don't dress or behave that way.  We know, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda probably got those ideas from your DVD collection, but it is always good to become aligned with your reality.

Sri Nithyananda, have you ever thought about writing a book from all of these recent experiences as a fugitive and now as an inmate? We think a titled called "Common Criminal Behavior to Uncommon Criminal Acts" just might capture the essence of your new life story. We'll be sure to purchase a copy and write a favorable review for it. We can't wait to read the upcoming chapters.  We'll be waiting.

Latest Headlines:

• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65789/nithyananda-likely-booked-fema.html (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/66097/nityanandas-police-custody-extended-two.html(Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/66191/nithyananda-hospitalised-chest-pain.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/66244/nityananda-discharged-hospital.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.tamilkey.com/nithyanandas-agreement-paper-with-lady-devotee-leaked.html
  
• (has actual contract)
• http://ibnlive.in.com/blogs/dpsatish/237/61773/nithyananda-the-sadhu-who-reads-cosmopolitan.html
  (Funny Article)
• http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/Charges-under-Fema-could-add-to-Nityanandas-woes/articleshow/5854818.cms
• http://www.bangaloremirror.com/index.aspx?page=article&sectid=10&contentid=201004252010042509564934348640daa
• http://www.bangaloremirror.com/index.aspx?page=article&sectid=10&contentid=2010042420100424052106135db57f069
• http://www.ndtv.com/news/cities/interrogating-sex-swami-was-like-a-punishment-20922.php
• http://www.ndtv.com/news/cities/seized-tiger-pelt-could-spell-trouble-for-sex-swami-20921.php
• http://www.ndtv.com/news/cities/did-bangalore-sex-swami-stage-manage-his-arrest-20610.php
• http://expressbuzz.com/states/tamilnadu/nithyananda-may-be-grilled-in-pondicherry/168293.html
• http://www.thehindu.com/2010/04/24/stories/2010042466410600.htm
• http://www.dnaindia.com/india/report_swami-nithyananda-discharged-from-hospital_1376157
• http://www.dnaindia.com/bangalore/report_us-agency-seeks-info-on-nithyananda-case-progress_1375632
• http://www.mid-day.com/news/2010/apr/270410-Swami-Nithyananda-Gopika-racket-CID-smuggler.htm
• http://mangalorean.com/news.php?newstype=local&newsid=178128
• http://sify.com/news/how-nityananda-had-kept-sexual-activities-secret-news-national-kexrbqadgje.html
• http://sify.com/news/nityananda-violated-rules-of-tantric-sex-sri-sri-news-international-ke0vadgjjfd.html
• http://www.asiantribune.com/news/2010/04/28/sex-scandal-nithyananda-may-be-brought-pondy-interrogation
• http://himachal.us/2010/04/25/nithyananda%E2%80%99s-associates-trail-runs-cold-in-himachal/19683/news/ravinder
• http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/world-news/nityananda-should-have-had-only-one-partner-ravi-shankar_100354324.html
• http://www.ptinews.com/news/627603_Nityananda-admitted-to-hospital-after-chest-pain
• http://www.behindindia.com/india-news-stories/apr-10-03/nithyananda-23-04-10.html
• http://indianrealist.wordpress.com/2010/04/26/can-hindus-self-govern-competitively-lessons-from-the-nithyananda-scandal/
  (boring dribble)
  

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 142: One Hundred and forty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 164: One hundred and sixty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Warrant Issued for Fraud-God, Nithyananda, Sachit's Last Stand & Investor's Club

It's Official, Slammer Time for Sex Swami, Nithyananda, Fugitive from the Law - Warrant Issued for His Arrest - Plus Updates on Cult's Unsavory Fraud
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. What's new? We don't care about your latest YouTube video, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. It's morning here in the United States, and we need to wake up. In fact, we think that you might need to wake up too, 'Swami' Nithyananda, and smell the coffee grinds. Hey, look, just in.

FLASH NEWS: CONFIRMED, ARREST WARRANT ISSUED FOR NITHYANANDA

Look, Sri Nithyananda, here's the full article on our favorite (not your favorite) newspaper, the Deccan Herald. 

Warrant Against Nithyananda

Gee, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you sure made Chandan Nandi, the reporter for the Deccan Herald, one busy man. He probably doesn't get to see his family because of you. But, that's nothing new.

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're still getting all the details, but looks like an arrest warrant was issued against you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, for failing to appear in a court in Sriperumbudur near Chennai, Tamil Nadu. Oh, oh, Sri Nithyananda, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police will now have to execute the warrant? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can go after you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, and arrest you? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can drag your smelly tush and produce it along with the rest of you before the court of law to hear the cheating case against you? 'Swami' Nithyananda, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can cross the state borders to look for you? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police do not have to wait for some very slow moving Chief Minister of Karnataka who seems to be sitting on his hands and just go and nab you? Perhaps now there will be a little momentum for other states to rush and file arrest warrants against you. Gee, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, this could become like an Easter Egg hunt. Are you still hiding in Nepal? Then, this could be come an international Easter Egg hunt, perhaps for one rotten egg.

Wow, Sri Nithyananda, do you remember how you used to wear the holy saffron cloth and then change into some really wild outfits. Back and forth. What ever you felt like wearing, you wore. The same went for your Swamis. If it suited them to be in white, they wore white. If it suited them to be in jeans, they wore jeans. That sanyasi tradition was really just like another skin to be added to the chameleon collection. And, yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you proved that wearing holy saffron is a real turn on to some ladies, it works better than spandex. But, if things keep on going as they are going, we're sure that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, will be wearing only saffron for years to come and nothing else. Hey, look, 'Swami' Nithyananda, here's a picture of your new holy uniform now:

'Swami' Nithyananda, this arrest warrant seems like very bad news. Will we still be seeing a bunch of new YouTube videos featuring that sick little giggle of yours? Just think, Sri Nithyananda, now there will be a whole new list palms you will need to grease, and just a little dab of your snake oil is not going to do it. You, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, will need some serious cash. But, don't worry, there, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we bet that your criminal, criminal lawyer will be happy to add the additional new business that you'll be giving him. Just a tip from us, be sure to pay him first. Looks like you'll be needing his services for some time to come.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, what are you going to do about this? Looks like your cash cow in Los Angeles has laid an egg and is closed. Where are you going to find the money to get you out of this? Oh, it's confirmed that you sent out your Public Relations Expert, Sri sometimes-Swami 'Stonewall' Sachitananda, a.k.a. Siva Vallabhaneni, to the rescue. Wasn't that the same person that released that video of himself leisurely leaning back and telling how blissful life was at your ashram the day after parts of it were burned down? Looks like Sachitananda is trying to corral all the fence-sitting donors and wrestle control of your now-closed temple in Los Angeles. Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you sure are giving Sachitananda a real challenge. Imagine what it's like for him to say that Swami will take care, and this is just a test to see who really is deserving of your 'enlightenment' and your 'grace' while news flashes race across the satellite TV and websites stating that a warrant is out for the arrest of now fugitive 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda for failing to manifest himself in court after offending religious sentiments and carrying out unsavory acts while wearing holy saffron cloth. It's going to take a team effort to get these donors to part with any of their cash now. Better get that smooth operator, coo-coo Muku, a.k.a. Sri Nithya Niranjananda, to help massage their money right our their wallets.

Hey, we have an idea, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Since you already robbed the dignity from all your room service ladies, and since you thoroughly brainwashed them to do anything in the name of service to you, and since the temple is officially closed to the public, and since we know there's already a big, king size mattress in your designated 'office' quarters that probably already is showing a bit of wear and tear... Oh, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we really can't suggest that. No, siree. We don't know where that idea came from... hmmm.... maybe that came from observing you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda at that Hindu Temple in Norwalk in March 2007 where you had one of our contributors stay outside your door and guard it. Were those some pranayama breathing exercises you were doing there along with your room service lady? Sorry, we digress. There must be a better way to make some quick cash and besides, that would make the criminal case against you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, even more severe. Sorry, it was just a thought that crept into our minds. But, just the same, you're not trying to raise money that way, are you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda?

Here's a better idea, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. We think you must have had an 'investors' club going. No, not the legitimate business that one of your swamis who was known for dignity and honesty (of course, he's already left you and your cult), but you know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that informal 'investors' club' that we're just getting wind of now. Perhaps instead of 'donations' some of your big, big, investors, oops, we meant to say 'donors' along with many of your ashramites poured in a bunch of cash, perhaps maybe their entire savings, because you, Sri Nithyananda, promised them a financial return on all this cash you were scooping up. Maybe this was the 'seed' money and once their were trees, then they could all eat the fruits from those trees. Is that what you, 'Swami' Nithyananda promised them? Somehow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're getting a flashback of the story of Adam and Eve, but we can't figure out who is playing the role of the snake. There's just too many suspects. But, our idea, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if there indeed was an investor's club, perhaps you can tell them the only way they will get their money back is if they pour even more money into your hopeless money pit. We know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that these folks are already gullible. And, they are already known to give you, Sri Nithyananda, money. So, these 'donors' just might believe this new story and open up their checkbooks and write you just enough cash to get you out of this minor inconvenience. And, if your 'investors', oops, we meant to say, 'donors' seem to hesitate, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, can have them sign a ten-page contract (sound familiar?) to assure them that those who invest, oops, we meant to say 'donate' now will get a special darshan (blessings) done by 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, the Healing Swami and now Fugitive of the Law. Perhaps you can pull together a whole little packet of 'energized' goodies, like a special mala (rosary), some sandals from Wal*Mart that were worn by the Master himself (that's you, Mr. Holy man but just remember to have Sachit take the price tag off first), and other trinkets that you couldn't give away just like the packets you put together for your Healer's Initiation. And, if these 'donors' still hesitate, you can add an addendum to your contract that says that if in the 'impossible' case that the Life Bliss Foundation (or what ever of the many Foundation names you plan to use) tanks, then those that 'donate' now will be the first to get their cash back before all the creditors and law suits claim all of the assets. Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you already know you have to play hardball when making holy business deals.

The Life Bliss Investor's Club Demonstrates the Ancient Mystery of Nithyananda's Pyramid Power

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if there was an 'investors' club, then that just might explain why there is still so much loyalty to you form people who we know otherwise would have had the smarts to get out from you long ago. This explains why Sri Nithyananda Niranjananda, a true family man, would still be out trying to support you and why he is trying to get others to pour even more cash into a scheme that is proving to be a loser. But, poor guy (no pun intended), if he continues this downward spiral, he might end up in the same boat that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, are in. How will he be able to explain that to his son? Kind of a drag if he gets put into a federal prison and then only gets to see his family through security gate. We really hope that this doesn't happen to him or even to Sri Sachitananda or even Bhaktananda. These swamis are actually really good people, we just wished they started to use their brains and a little common sense. Let's wish them luck, Sri Nithyananda... Sri Nithyananda? Are you still there? Sri Nithyananda! That's not the Tamil Police!... That's just some Boy Scots asking us to buy tickets for their raffel. We'll tell them that you already gave at the office, and you can come out from under the bed now. Gee, that bed has been the center of so much trouble. Maybe 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you can start a YouTube lecture about the how beds add bad karma to people's lives and how true devotees who don't want bad karma should sleep in phone booths. Sorry, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we can see you didn't like that idea, but honestly, it isn't much better than your current batch of YouTube videos.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 134: One Hundred and thirty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 156: One hundred and fifty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

God-Fraud, Nithyananda, Denied Entry to the U.S.A. - Visa Canceled

U.S.A. Says "NO!" to Nithyananda and His Cult; Spares U.S. Citizens from Fraud

* * Breaking News * *
We just got word from reliable sources that the U.S. Embassy has canceled 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda's U.S. Visa. This is 'officially' unconfirmed, but we'll give confirmation as soon as we receive it.  Confirmed, our information source seems solid that Nithyananda Swami had his U.S. visa canceled a second time.

Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. Where have you been all this time? Oh, yes, that's right. It is a secret. Some say you've been hiding in Nepal, some say in Tamil Nadu, some say in the VIP section of some professional cricket team where all the cheerleaders hang out. We guess nobody knows for sure except your hairdresser, 'Swami' Nithyananda. We guess that adds to your mystique. But, one place that doesn't seem likely is that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda are hiding in the U.S.A. You know, Sri Nithyananda, there was a rumor that you were hanging out at Gilligan's Island, but that doesn't seem so likely right now. Look, just in:

"U.S. Embassy Cancels Nithyananda's Visa; Places Him on Watch"

'Swami' Nithyananda, we're still waiting for official confirmation, but just the same, ouch!  It looks like it is deja vu  all over again.   But, don't worry there, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're sure you can rally and get a new visa. Remember April 2, 2007 when you had your tourist visa canceled but were able to rally all of your supporters to get you a religious visa? So, you've been through this. Old hat. Oh, no, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we forgot something. This time you don't have any supporters to rally behind you. They all felt cheated and left you. So, this means you're going to have to go to the U.S. Embassy and wait in line just like everyone else. We're sure you'll meet some interesting people in line. Perhaps you might even meet some young attractive students that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, might be able to recruit for future service to your, ah, mission or research department. So, think of this as an opportunity.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, with your great ability to see everything around you, the future, the past, all dimensions, did you see this coming? Ah, we get it now. This is why you had your ashram cleared out, so you wouldn't be stuck with an extra month's rent. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, always had an eye for finances.

So, what's going to happen now, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? You know, all of those hot yoga ladies from L.A. that wear those tight spandex outfits that you were hitting on? Now, it looks like you will have to convince them to come see you in India, that is whenever you set up shop again and sit on your 24(K) gold throne. So, how are you going to convince them to come over to your place? We get it now, you'll have Bhaktananda and Medhananda recruit them for you. Hmmmm. That might not be so optimal for you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. You see, Bhaktananda seems to only be able to recruit like-minded hardcore types like professional school bus drivers and retired roller derby ladies. We don't know how happy you'll be with ladies like that. And, Medhananda, with his eye-sight, which you never healed, there's no telling what he'll send your way.  Chances are she will be able to walk and talk, but the rest just might be a guess.   It will be the new Mystery of Mysteries.   Just the same, you might want to check the ID of any ladies that Medhananda recruits for you just to make sure, that they are, ahem, at least 18.

What you need, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, is a real smooth operator who is still loyal to you who could convince people who are still sitting on the fence to jump and fall off a cliff even when these 'fence sitters' can see that it is pure insanity to support you. There's gotta be somebody. Wait! We know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you can get Sri Nithya Niranjananda, a.k.a. coo-coo Mukku. We think that he must have been a lemming in his past life, leading the pack to follow him over to the promised land. Too bad that in this life, he just became a regular old rat.  A rather large one at that.  Oh, well. But, he is a smooth operator. No doubt about that. But, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there's still a problem there. Sri Nithya Niranjananda seems to have an inclination of super-sizing everything. You, know, 128 oz. 'Big Gulp', over-sized Ford Taurus, all-you-can-eat buffets, Costco-sized portions, you know, the works with everything on it. So, Sri Nithyananda, you might want to reinforce the furniture in your pad, especially the bed, just as a precaution. We wouldn't want to see you with a broken home, even though you're a proven expert in breaking up other people's homes. No siree. But, just be ready for a really super big surprise.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, kind of a bummer that your visa got canceled. But, don't worry, Sri Nithyananda, a lot of people get their visa denied and placed on watch. We bet Bin Laden, for instance, will never know the joy of riding the Magic Dumbo ride at Disneyland either. Say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if you're visa has been denied and you've been put on the 'watch list' by the U.S. Government, does that mean your other cronies, sorry, we meant to say other swamis, like Sadhananda (Ayya), Bhaktananda, Atmamaneesha (Mr. Tiwari), Ma Bhaktika, Dheera (Martyn Williams), Ma Bharti, Sachitananda, Sevananda, Pranananda, Gnanananda, Roopananda, Ma Achalananda, Ma Arpana etc. will also be watched and denied entry? Left high and dry. Tsk. Tsk. Pity.

Hey, there, Sri Nithyananda. Don't despair. We know a way out. You need to become a famous rock star with a huge fan base, and then the U.S. Officials will have to let you in. That happens all the time. Let's see, with your singing talents, or lack of, hey, you could start up a punk rock band. Perfect. You, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda already have that stage presence. But, there is a problem. Punk rockers are known to be a bit rowdy, just like your swamis. But, the problem is that they often fight back. So, if you try to break one of your canes over someone's head, that person just might jump on stage and return the favor in kind. So, unless you're prepared for this, we don't suggest that you break stuff on people's heads any more. But, everything else about you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is perfect. So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, what shall we call your new band? Hmmm... how about "Nastyananda and the Psycho Swamis" or maybe "Swami Shim Sham and His Wham Bams". Yes, those don't sound so good to us either. Perhaps our reader, [hint, hint] will come up with some really fitting band names for you.

In the meantime, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you need to practice up on some songs so you can get a hit record. Here's a band just perfect for you, 'Swami' Nithyananda. It is an early British punk band called "Sham 69".

Yes, we know that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, could relate with a band named "Sham 69", since both words, "sham" and "69" perfectly describe your operations, to a tee.  Anyway, these fine young men also were once denied entry to the U.S.A. We don't know why. But after some hard work and convincing interviews, they were allowed into the U.S.A. to tour and spread the love and bliss that their music conjures. In fact, they wrote a song about your now shared experience about having their U.S. visa canceled titled "No Entry". What luck, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there's a YouTube video with that exact song. So, you'll know exactly how to sing it. Here it is:



and even more luck, here's the lyrics:

They wanted us to go
To New York City
But the man in the embassy
Said, "Oh, what a pity
We don't know things you done in the past
But never mind, son
Have a little puff on the grass"

They didn't want us in the U.S.A.
We didn't wanna go their anyway
They don't want us in the U.S.A., puke

Our manager said to us
"What`s all the fuss"
We said, "We don`t know
But they won`t let us go"
"What did you do to make them do this to you"
"I dunno, Boss"
Carry on puffing the grass

They didn't want us in the U.S.A.
We didn`t wanna go their anyway
They don`t want us in the U.S.A., puke x2

The press all started to ring
Asked what was happening
Our boss said, "I don't know"
But I said, "They won't let us go"
We don`t care what you think of us
This is where we live
Stick America up your arse

OK, 'Swami' Nithyananda, do you think you can sing like that? We can't wait to see the new you in action and back in the U.S.A. Sri Nithyananda, can we have your autograph? Please?

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 132: One Hundred and thirty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 154: One hundred and fifty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Fraud-God, Nithyananda, Closes Up 'Vedic' Cult Temple (for now)

Another Crack in Fraud-God's Crumbling Empire
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. How's your USA breadbasket empire doing? Oh, we see. Instead of a 'bread basket', maybe you should call it 'dead in a casket'. Boy, that sure crumbled in a hurry. We drove by your once bustling ashram at 928 Huntington Dr, Duarte, California, and looks mighty deserted. A ghost town. But, knowing your dark tantric practices, it always was one. We don't know what type of energy the new tenants will find in your old quarters, no. 5. But, rest assured, we are pretty certain that the new tenant's bed will start shaking and there will be lots of moaning. Oh, scary.

So, what's the matter? No one wants to live there? Where's your marketing department when you need them, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? It might be a tough sell. Let's see if we can come up with a pitch. "Come live with Swami Sex Offender and experience his energy field!" No thanks. We can see why there are no takers. We're pretty sure that the landlord will be glad to get her property back and start making money again. No telling how much she lost on that deal. But, don't worry; we're sure she'll upgrade the place even if she makes it into a slumlord. You know, even tenants that have jobs now and then will contribute more to society than the tenants before them. And, if there's drug usage, those addicts are only hurting themselves. So, that's a 1000-fold improvement right there.

And, what about that Nithyananda Vedic Temple, also the Head Quarters of your Western Empire? You, know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that place you spent so much time and energy 'transforming'. So what if some people injured themselves permanently while doing your slave labor and all kinds of other weird stuff that happened there? It was your temple, with your name on it, and with your ripped off Osho logo of a Paramahamsa (which you were not). 'Swami' Nithyananda, do you remember how you used to love bragging about how much better your Vedic Temple was than compared to all the other Hindu temples? You used to love giving specific examples like the murtis (statues) in the Norwalk Sanatan Dharma Temple were ugly... how the Malibu temple was completely mismanaged... and...on...and...on...and...on. There didn't seem to be a temple any where in the U.S.A. that was up to your high standards. Only your temples were so perfect. Divinely so. Heaven on earth. Say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what's this in our inbox from Constant Contact sent by the Nithyananda Vedic Temple?:

Dear Devotees:

Beginning on Saturday, April 17 the Nithyananda Vedic Temple will be closed to the public. Our deepest thanks for your patronage over the years. We look forward to seeing you again when the temple re-opens.

With best regards,
The Administration of Nithyananda Vedic Temple

What? Closed? Are you trying to sell off the Vedic Temple to pay for all those legal fees, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? How much are bribes to all the courts these days? We're sure the going rate has increased since all those pictures of you on your 24(K) gold thrones have been showcased on your website. How many of those thrones do you have? Well, it looks like you might be out one 24(K) gold throne very soon, unless there are some devotees that want to store in their garage. Mind you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that once it is in someone's garage, there's little chance that heavy piece of bulk is ever going to be moved. So, pick your garage carefully, and hope they still have enough money after experiencing you that they are not going to lose their home any time soon.

So, really, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what's going to happen to your Vedic Temple? Are you going to just keep the temple in mothballs until you can come out from hiding? Who's going to pay the mortgage? Who's going to pay the bills? Who's going to turn the lights on and off? Maybe 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you can rent your temple out to motorcycle clubs so they can have a big party there on the weekends. That just might make your temple popular again.

Actually, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we're kind of hoping that the community will take it over and make it a real temple that the Divine would actually love to call home. Who knows, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you might actually get some good karma if that happened. Yes, it is a long shot, but who knows, even you, Sri Nithyananda, just might be capable of doing the right thing.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 130: One Hundred and thirty days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 152: One hundred and fifty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Nithyananda's Outfits Come Out of the Closet; Fraud-God in Drag

No Skeletons Found in Nithyananda's Closet; Just Ladies Outfits
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda.  How are you doing today?  Rrrrrrrabu.  Oh, our gruntanese translator says that you're not too happy.  What is it now, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda?  Oh, we see, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, don't have a thing to wear.  Since you've been a fugitive, you've just keep wearing the same old outfit.  No more space suits, no more Michael Jackson extra outfits, no more Osho-me-too-zoot-suits, no more Sgt. Peppers, no more Star Trek, no more Spring attire from fashion show run way crossed with samba dancers attire, no more.  no more.  Just back to basics.  But, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we thought that real, genuine sanyasis (renunciant monks) just keep three sets of saffron cloth plus perhaps some undies, and that's all you need.  Is this true, 'Swami' Nithyananda?  We know that being an 'enlightened' healing master that none of the rules applied to you, so we didn't expect much from a dress code.  But, you know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if you want to aim for your comeback, you might try to look a little simple and not like a show case for an Indian version of a Liberace wedding.

But, don't worry, 'Swami' Nithyananda, as soon as your goons grease the right palms, you'll be right back in that famous penthouse suite in Bidadi and you'll have access to all of your wardrobe once again.  What's this, Sri Nithyananda?  Another article from the Deccan Herald.  Those guys must love you, shall we take a look?:

Criminal Investigation Department (CID) Digs into Swami’s Fund Sources

Oh my gosh, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, look! The Criminal Investigation Department (CID) took at least 120 saffron robes and other outfits including several ladies' outfits, dresses, and sarees. 'Swami' Nithyananda, did you save those for your room service ladies or were they souvenirs that they left behind? The Deccan Herald didn't go into much detail, but now we have a glimpse that perhaps when sometimes-Swami Sri 'Stonewall' Sachitananda asserted that Dhyanapeetam was a very transparent organization, now we begin to see. Perhaps we're beginning to see all right... see through it all. That is quite a revealing revelation about you and your wardrobe, 'Swami' Nithyananda. Wow, 120 outfits. Why simple math that means that you can wear one a day, every day, for a whole season, and still not have to do a single load of laundry. We guess that bachelor living style is something that just doesn't go away after wandering all of those, ah, zero years, in the Himalayas.

Say, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, with over 120 outfits, this puts you in the same league as Imelda Marcos. Shall we now call you Nithymeldananda? Yes, 'Swami' Nithyananda, the police said that you had a ton of accessories. We bet they were all 24(K) gold, were they not? What were these accessories? Oh, we see, 'Swami' Nithyananda, there were female jewellery like earrings, necklaces, bracelets, and belly-button (navel)rings. Were these all for you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? Why of course, we forgot about your special Devi Darshan, you know, where you masquerade as the Divine Mother and parade in front of all your brainwashed followers to gauge exactly how brainwashed they really are (and perhaps to gauge which ones are physically aroused).  Sorry, to say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, but you come off as a cheap imposter...in so many ways.

OK, Sri Nithyananda, yes, we now remember your antics at the last Life Bliss Engineering Program where you even wiggled a little. Sri Nithyananda, is that where you got that catty laugh of yours? Well the first time we heard that, we seriously thought that a chicken was stuck somewhere in the egg laying process. Then we realized that it was just you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda.

'Swami' Nithyananda, we would love to go on and roast you some more, but we already wrote about your old queen habits in this post:

Divinity Celebrates Swami Nithyananda's Jayanti (Birthday) with a Mirror Universe of Truth Website

So, we won't go over them again. Just that we were a lot shocked about how you might be luring in young men into the mix. We never saw anything like that happen in Los Angeles, but then again, we would never put anything past you. You sir, are very resourceful, but in all the wrong ways.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, what else did the police take? Did they take your vanity mirror with all the little make-up lights? That special hair remover of yours, you know, how you got your legs to be so silky and smooth? 'Swami' Nithyananda, they better not have taken your curling iron. That would have been too much. Stop! Police brutality! Give back Swami his curling iron now!

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 122: One Hundred and twenty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 144: One hundred and forty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Nithyananda Needs Breath Mints After Eating His Fraud

GruruSwamiG Blasts 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda for His 'Sincere' Smirk Fraud
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda.  How are you doing?  "Rrrrrrrrrrraf."  Oh, our gruntanese translator says that you're doing rough.  OK, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we're beginning to understand your grunts.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, do you remember GuruSwamiG?  Of course you do, 'Swami' Nithyananda.  We featured her videos on our blog just a week ago.  Yes, we know, it is all about you, Sri Nithyananda.  We know that this world is all about you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda.  Let's watch her again, shall we?:

GruruSwamiG on Nithyananda's Fraudulent Resignation Part I


GruruSwamiG on Nithyananda's Fraudulent Resignation Part II


Say, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, looks like GruruSwamiG's Truth cuts through your pile of so-called sincerity like knife through butter.  Let's recap that last part of the second video, shall we?

"All I can say to Nithyananda, shame on you! I went one time to see you and told you what you are giving is dangerous and you pooh-poohed it. OK.  OK, well, the universe is showing you for what you are. And, I thank the universe for putting it out there exactly what it is. And, thank you (Nithyananda) for giving that most insincere speech about leaving and how spiritual and holy you still think you are, and how you are stepping down for the "good of the community". No, you are stepping down to save your own hide.

Please (Nithyananda) stop playing games with people. And, more importantly, Nithyananda, stop playing games with yourself.  Be honest.  Because the first, three pointings to this path is honesty, integrity, and transparency.  Until you (Nithyananda) are honest with yourself, you won't be honest with anyone else.  OK?

So, have the integrity now, to turn yourself into the police rather running and hiding. And, be transparent with the actions that you have done. Don't try to make a spin on it and say that it didn't happen. Don't abuse these women (room service ladies) any longer. Don't abuse them any longer. Give them back some sort of self-respect that you have taken away from them.

And (Nithyananda) take off the saffron clothing. Be what you are. Not as what you would like to believe you are, because you are not that."

Wow, we couldn't have said it better.  'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, are you happy with this?  You seem to have a big grin on your face, but the rest of you looks a little out of place.  Yes, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that sure is a big grin on your face.  Have you been eating well?  We hope so, because, you are what you eat.  And, what does fraud taste like?  Does it leave a good taste in your mouth? 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we hate to break you the news, but you really need to do something about that breath of yours.  Can we offer you some breath mints?

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 114: One Hundred and forteen days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 136: One hundred and thirty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Save the Purity of Fraud in Nithyananda's Cult - Sign the Petition

Signatures Needed to Help Counter the Online Attacks (like from this Blog) Against 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda & His Fraud
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda, how are you doing?  Rrrababoo.  Oh, our gruntanese translator says that you haven't been with a room service lady for over two weeks now, and you're going through withdrawals.  Yes, yes, that would make someone grumpy.

Well, there's good news for you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda.  There's an online petition to:

Stop the Defamation of Paramahamsa Nithyananda

We noted that your goal was to reach 100,000 signatures to prove that being a sex fiend doesn't necessary preclude someone from defrauding others through spirituality.  Yes, being sex offender and dark tantric master can go hand-and-hand.  (Ah, just the same, Sri Nithyananda, not so close there; you don't need to touch us.  Thank you.)  So far your petition site has been up for almost two weeks, and you already have 592 signatures!  Wow, there's 592 people still willing to stand up and display their name online to show the world that they are strongly behind a pervert.  Well, maybe not too strongly behind, but they are there, nonetheless.

Anyway, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we were a little concerned.  If you goal is to reach 100,000 signatures, and you're barely getting 300 a week, let's see that will take you, 'Swami' Nithyananda about six and a half years.  (100,000 / 300 = 6.4 years).    Gee, Sri Nithyananda, we don't know if that petition website will still be up before you get those signatures.  Do you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, still have plans to build a big 10,000-seat stadium in your ashram?  Well, reason we ask is that it might be a little hard to fill it up at this rate.  Hey, we have an idea.  Why don't you order some 9,900 life-size dolls that you can quickly install around the stadium to make it look like you have that many supporters?  Hmmm, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what do you think we can use and where can you obtain all those life-size dolls?  Perhaps you can get some ideas from your pay-for-view television?

OK, why you're thinking about that, we just want to say that we really do like you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, and we really do want to help reach that goal of 100,000 signatures.  Honest.  So, to help you, we're going to encourage all of our readers to go to your site and sign the petition.  The best thing is that our readers don't have to sign with their real names.  Any name will do.  So, for all of our readers who secretly would love to have a Nithyananda name but don't want to have the hassle of changing it legally, now is the time for them to act.  Simply, they just need to sign the petition using any name they like, and voila, they're done.

Just think of the possibilities, 'Swami' Nithyananda.  Our readers could become 'Ananda Pornstar', 'Nithya Psychopath', 'Ananda Hooker', oh, that one is already taken.  Well, they can use just about any name that will remind them of you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda.  And, then, the best thing of all, 'Swami' Nithyananda, our readers can then leave a comment about how much you mean to them and how you, Sri Nithyananda, transformed their lives.  Touching. And, for those that really like to have a little extra exposure, our readers can upload a picture of themselves or anything that reflects their love for you.

Why look, here's a perfect example of one of your supporters from our blog now, Sri Nithyananda.  This petitioner is comment 588, but maybe he won't last that long, but we appreciate the effort.  Anyway, here is the comment:

Nithya Cockroach, California
All my brothers and sisters, 1000's of them, we all love Paramahamsa Nithyananda because he drops all kinds of food in his private room when he is alone with those curvy room service ladies. We always eat so well. Thanks! And, we can lay our eggs everywhere, just like the master does. So, please continue to support Nithyananda, because if he can no longer go back to the United States, our food supply is doomed.

"Nithyananda simply transformed me!"

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that's very touching. That deserves a six-legged clap, much unlike the case of clap you have right now, don't you agree?  And, 'Swami' Nithyananda, do you really drop a lot of crumbs when you, know, are alone in your private quarters with your room service ladies? That sounds kind of kinky.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 111: One Hundred and eleven days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 133: One hundred and thirty-three days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.