Cult of the La La Land Hides the Fraud of Nithyananda via YouTube

Terrorist Quality YouTube Videos Just Keep Coming - and Will Be Used As Evidence Against Nithyananda
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda.  Wow, looks like your video making days are on hold for a while.  Does that mean we'll get a break from your constant barrage of psycho-babble from your 'Life Bliss' Channel on YouTube?  Oh, heavens.  Looks like all of your hardcore disciples did learn one thing from you... that is how to capture their ramblings and make a YouTube video.  It's like as if the Energizer Bunny  multiplied several times over and created a whole army of self-winding, never stopping battery-babbling operated toys.  And, they all had the same reprogrammed software and hardware.  Now, who do you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, did all that transformation?

Lets' look at all of these videos for just a moment.  Let's see.  There's the round up of about nine of your seriously brainwashed ashramites giving testimonials about how happy they are in La La Land and how the big bad media is causing all these lies.  Looks like like a case study of brainwashing.  Not a free thought anywhere. Perhaps not even a thought.  Wonder where all the other ashramites who rediscovered their senses and ability to reason are? If this most blissful place on earth was actually true, then where are all those people who escaped?  Don't forget that nearly a thousand 'blissful' people in Jonestown drank cyanide laced cherry flavored Kool Aide.  Believe it or not, the Jonestown ladies even willingly fed this 'enlightenment' juice to their own babies as they watched foam churn out of their young innocent mouths, and then these mothers guzzled down a lethal dose themselves.

Then next up on the cue is piranha lady.  Dig those bulging eyes and mouth that seems to bite with every breath.  We thought she was about to swim out from our monitor and attack us.  So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is this 'transformation' the results someone can expect from following your teachings?  Wow, thanks for confirming to the world.  Our reply is "No thanks!"

OK, Sri Nithyananda, you can view the real Life Bliss Piranha here.  Just don't get too close:



Then, in the same video, the spiritual terrorists parade their own children to become part of the support network for a sexual  predator.  We haven't seen that maneuver since Saddam Hussein displayed captured kids giving him a big hug on the eve of the first Gulf War.  And, then the hit parade just keeps coming... full of refugees from your now defunct LA temple and old ladies who have no where else to go.  So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if you have no where else to go, and a bunch of your landlords / captors shoved a microphone in front of you, what would you say?

And, then in the same video, the Canadian contingency steps in.  Let see, there's Nithyanadna Dheera, a.k.a. Martyn Williams, Ma Munivati, a.k.a. Antonie Vanmerlin, and not featured, but present, Ma Ananda Bharati, a.k.a. Sharon Kasic.  Yes, these are kind and gentle souls that are completely brainwashed.  We remember that Nithyananda Dheera must have been one of the masterminds (sarcastic irony) behind this winner of a defunct blog:

http://nithyananda-cult-clarity.blogspot.com

that hasn't been updated since last year.  The ironic final posting was 'Truth Requires No Embellishment'.  We thought that are more appropriate title would be 'Truth Requires No Embarrassment'.   If you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, look to the right hand side, you can see one of the supporters of this blog is the ice cream man with icicles dripping on his frozen-over brain.  Yes, that's Dheera.

So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what type of visa are these Canadian followers who are staying permanently in your ashram on?  In most countries, any type of work whether it is paid or not-for-pay (volunteer) work is strictly prohibited on a tourist visa.  Is this the case in India?  Attention, Sri KN Yogappa and the CID Team, you can get three boneheads in one bag if you act quickly.  Don't worry there, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we've done our part and reported these Canadians to the United States Immigration and Customs Enforcement (US ICE) Agency, so, they should save themselves the trouble and only purchase one-way tickets back to Canada, eh?

Moving on up the YouTube playlist, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we see that you had one of your prized acharya (marketing specialist)  Pretty Boy Floyd, a.k.a. Sri Nithya Gnanananda, a.k.a. Mr. Noble, flaunt his straightened locks as any manicured true sanyasi (renunicant) would have done, but it looks like he has renounced eyeshadow and lipstick at least for this photo shoot.



Sri Nithyananda, is this your sex offending dentist at the ashram that only does his drilling at night? On only selected molars?  'Swami' Nithyananda, we have to admit that there seems to be a tired but content serene look on Gnanananda's face.  Kind of like the look we might expect to see on Hugh Hefner after he has had a long night of taking inventory at his mansion.  Oh, well, with you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, not in the picture anymore, someone needs to comfort all those ladies, all those sad ladies, all those deprived ladies, all those lonely ladies, that everything will be OK and they will continue to still receive your fulfillment and special energy even when you're not a around.   It's a tough job with long hours, but someone has to do it.  Perhaps Gnanananda is secretly hoping that your detention will be extended so he can get some extra practice in for his new role.


Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, and this video just came in.  Is this the articulate way that your brand of enlightenment will deliver?  Public speaking by Ghost Masters?  Frightening.  'Swami' Nithyananda, are you sure he's not high on marijuana? Four minutes into the video, even the photographer gets bored and starts fidgeting with the camera.



'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you seem to have quite an impact on this chap.  At 4:40, we find out that your transformation makes people so they are not even afraid of 'a cold bath in the morning' in the steamy tropics!  Now, he's "not even afraid of catching cold.... and these things are not such a big deal."  Wow, Sri Nithyananda, now that is a total transformation.  Where can we sign up? And, 'Swami' Nithyananda, he really thinks we should all experience your energy first hand. To be honest, it's not your hands that we worried about. 

Then finally, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we have the crown jewel of your testimonial YouTube videos.  It is an outsider who knew you from your shared Ramakrishna Mission days.  Let's take a look:



Wow, we were sure surprised at the title:

"Nithyananda's Brother Disciple at Sri Ramakrishna Ashram Speaks"

We thought for certain that this was someone from the Ramakrishna Mission supporting you. We didn't think that anyone from the Ramakrishna Mission could be supporting you after you stole a true Paramahamsa's works, after you degraded the title of Paramahamsa, after you lied about your association with the Ramakrishna Mission, after you called time and time again that the Ramakrishna Mission was a "dead institution", that was "very bureaucratic",  and "rife with hierarchy". We know the career caretakers of the Ramamkrishna Mission were forgiving souls, but they are also defenders of the Truth. So, it came to a shock that someone from such an established institution of wholesome goodness would be a willing participant of propaganda propping up a 'Porno-mahamsa' (thank you, loyal reader for this great line). Then we realized that this sincere looking chap with the freshly washed dhoti (traditional prayer clothes) was not actually in the Ramakrishna Mission any more. In fact, he mentioned that he was there for nine years. Say, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, nine years at the Ramakrishna Mission? Doesn't the Ramakrishna Mission only gave out sanyasi (monk) initiation after ten years? So, why would someone stay with the organization nine years and then stop short of going the full ten years? Was this his idea to stop or the Ramakrishna Mission's idea to stop? Looking at his inability to discern Truths, we have a strong idea of which scenario was most likely.

Anyway, 'Swami' Nithyananda, the part of the video which we all thought made it a classic was exactly at 0:30 (thirty seconds) into the video.

"He was actually with me (in the Ramamkrishan Order) from 1995 to 1999."

There we go. Right to our findings. Of course, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, then hiked up to Belur at the Ramakrishna Order before you left in a huff somewhere in the year 2000. But, for 1995 to 1999, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, were at the Ramakrishna Mission in Chennai. Yet, another testimonial. Your friend, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, went on to say how you had the responsibilities of looking after the kitchen department. But, you, Sri Nithyananda, said that you spent your wandering years going in and out of different monasteries. Well, if you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, were looking after the kitchen department, then those poor monks might have been on prolonged and permanent fast. Yes, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, would have been noticed if you were missing, eve if it was just for a few hours. Then at 3:10 of the video, your former roommate said that you decided to become a wandering monk, thereby bypassing the Belur Matt days. Oh, how time erases memory. So, according to him, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda started your wandering in 1999. Do you, Sri Nithyananda, still claim this to be nine-years of wandering? Seven-years of wandering? Six-years of wandering? Most recently, over thirteen-years of wandering? All starting from 1999? Wow, that time continuum zone must have been one busy place.

Well, 'Swami' Nithyananda. We really can't blame your friend for giving such an enthusiastic testimonial about the amazing life of a real, genuine Paramahamsa. No siree. What amazes us is that your video team who have certain edited this video along with all your other videos must have heard from time to time, again and again, about all of your stories of wandering.  Didn't they have the common sense to edit that damning portion out? Now we can see that this one particular video has been edited and doesn't quite look like the terrorist quality videos that has become your standard production line since you decided to skip town and go into a vow of silence.  This  video, in contrast, was smoothly transitioned and edited nicely. So, there certainly wasn't the lack of ability or lack of time not to edit that portion out. Therefore, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we can conclude that your video team had their perceptions so bent that they only can hear things in only in terms of 'is this for our Master, Nithyananda' or 'is this against our master, Nithyananda'. No other criteria of discrimination seems to exists. Your followers cannot even recognize even simple numbers that make you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, look like a fool.  'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, could this be seen as brainwashing?

Latest Headlines:

• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65385/godman-goes-lock-up-laboured.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65370/godman-conman.html
  (Deccan Herald editorial)
• http://www.hindustantimes.com/Nityananda-produced-in-court/H1-Article1-534371.aspx
• http://www.daijiworld.com/news/news_disp.asp?n_id=76171
• http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/Godmans-flock-signed-sex-pacts-/articleshow/5846585.cms
• http://www.ndtv.com/news/cities/chappal-offering-for-sex-swami-20699.php
• http://www.ndtv.com/news/cities/sex-swami-nithyananda-arrested-in-himachal-20548.php

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 137: One Hundred and thirty-seven days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 159: One hundred and fifty-nine days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Fraud-God Sex Swami Nithyananda Arrested in Himachal Pradesh

You Are Busted!
'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda has been charged with four sections of the Indian Penal Code:

1) Section 295: Defiling a place of worship (including putting his picture everywhere)

2) Section 420:  Cheating and Fraud (for conducting 'holy' business as usual)

3) Section 376:  Rape and other hanky-panky

4) Section 377:  Unnatural sex with minors and goats. Bahhhhhumbug.

Looks like the police got quite a haul in its net.  After bagging one big bird, a paramahamsa, no doubt, the police got three turkeys and one vulture:

1. Parananda
2. Atmamaneesha (Mr. Tiwari)
3. Arpit
4. Bhaktananda (Mr. Gopal Sheelum Reddy)

(We're waiting confirmation on these arrests.) Sorry, you guys.  But when you sleep with a dog, you're bound to get fleas.  Updated possible list includes:

1. Nithya Sanatanananda
2. Arpit (Armpit) Sangil
3. Arun Raj
4. Bhaktananda (Mr. Gopal Sheelum Reddy)

Just like the old saying, a bird in the hand, is worth a self-proclaimed-paramahamsa in the bush. But, we saw that in the video already.



Latest Headlines:

• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65080/swami-nityananda-arrested-himachal.html
  Go, Chandan, Go!  Great work!!!  Voot! Voot! Bravo Deccan Herald!
  
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65190/cell-number-gave-away-godmans.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65080/nithyananda-arrested.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65183/disillusioned-donors-serve-notice-reclaim.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.deccanherald.com/content/65181/from-plush-environs-lock-up.html
  (Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald)
• http://www.ndtv.com/news/cities/sex-swami-nithyananda-arrested-in-himachal-20548.php
  
• http://news.oneindia.in/2010/04/21/swami-nithyananda-arrested-sex-scandal-karnataka.html
  
• http://indiatoday.intoday.in/site/Story/93931/India/On+the+run,+Swami+Nityananda+arrested+near+Shimla+hill+station.html
  
• http://www.bangaloremirror.com/article/10/20100422201004220401237411dffaf62/Nithyananda-nabbed-in-HP.html
  
• http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/Swami-Nityananda-arrested-in-Solan/articleshow/5841947.cms
  
• http://www.tribuneindia.com/2010/20100422/main4.htm
  
• http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/8634696.stm
  
• http://www.daijiworld.com/news/news_disp.asp?n_id=76117
  
• http://news.in.msn.com/national/article.aspx?cp-documentid=3848976
  
• http://www.india-server.com/news/swami-nityananda-flown-to-bangalore-24937.html
  
• http://calcuttatube.com/swami-nityananda-4-others-held-from-himachal-village/83093/
  

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 136: One Hundred and thirty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 158: One hundred and fifty-eight days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Warrant Issued for Fraud-God, Nithyananda, Sachit's Last Stand & Investor's Club

It's Official, Slammer Time for Sex Swami, Nithyananda, Fugitive from the Law - Warrant Issued for His Arrest - Plus Updates on Cult's Unsavory Fraud
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. What's new? We don't care about your latest YouTube video, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. It's morning here in the United States, and we need to wake up. In fact, we think that you might need to wake up too, 'Swami' Nithyananda, and smell the coffee grinds. Hey, look, just in.

FLASH NEWS: CONFIRMED, ARREST WARRANT ISSUED FOR NITHYANANDA

Look, Sri Nithyananda, here's the full article on our favorite (not your favorite) newspaper, the Deccan Herald. 

Warrant Against Nithyananda

Gee, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you sure made Chandan Nandi, the reporter for the Deccan Herald, one busy man. He probably doesn't get to see his family because of you. But, that's nothing new.

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're still getting all the details, but looks like an arrest warrant was issued against you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, for failing to appear in a court in Sriperumbudur near Chennai, Tamil Nadu. Oh, oh, Sri Nithyananda, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police will now have to execute the warrant? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can go after you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, and arrest you? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can drag your smelly tush and produce it along with the rest of you before the court of law to hear the cheating case against you? 'Swami' Nithyananda, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can cross the state borders to look for you? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police do not have to wait for some very slow moving Chief Minister of Karnataka who seems to be sitting on his hands and just go and nab you? Perhaps now there will be a little momentum for other states to rush and file arrest warrants against you. Gee, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, this could become like an Easter Egg hunt. Are you still hiding in Nepal? Then, this could be come an international Easter Egg hunt, perhaps for one rotten egg.

Wow, Sri Nithyananda, do you remember how you used to wear the holy saffron cloth and then change into some really wild outfits. Back and forth. What ever you felt like wearing, you wore. The same went for your Swamis. If it suited them to be in white, they wore white. If it suited them to be in jeans, they wore jeans. That sanyasi tradition was really just like another skin to be added to the chameleon collection. And, yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you proved that wearing holy saffron is a real turn on to some ladies, it works better than spandex. But, if things keep on going as they are going, we're sure that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, will be wearing only saffron for years to come and nothing else. Hey, look, 'Swami' Nithyananda, here's a picture of your new holy uniform now:

'Swami' Nithyananda, this arrest warrant seems like very bad news. Will we still be seeing a bunch of new YouTube videos featuring that sick little giggle of yours? Just think, Sri Nithyananda, now there will be a whole new list palms you will need to grease, and just a little dab of your snake oil is not going to do it. You, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, will need some serious cash. But, don't worry, there, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we bet that your criminal, criminal lawyer will be happy to add the additional new business that you'll be giving him. Just a tip from us, be sure to pay him first. Looks like you'll be needing his services for some time to come.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, what are you going to do about this? Looks like your cash cow in Los Angeles has laid an egg and is closed. Where are you going to find the money to get you out of this? Oh, it's confirmed that you sent out your Public Relations Expert, Sri sometimes-Swami 'Stonewall' Sachitananda, a.k.a. Siva Vallabhaneni, to the rescue. Wasn't that the same person that released that video of himself leisurely leaning back and telling how blissful life was at your ashram the day after parts of it were burned down? Looks like Sachitananda is trying to corral all the fence-sitting donors and wrestle control of your now-closed temple in Los Angeles. Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you sure are giving Sachitananda a real challenge. Imagine what it's like for him to say that Swami will take care, and this is just a test to see who really is deserving of your 'enlightenment' and your 'grace' while news flashes race across the satellite TV and websites stating that a warrant is out for the arrest of now fugitive 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda for failing to manifest himself in court after offending religious sentiments and carrying out unsavory acts while wearing holy saffron cloth. It's going to take a team effort to get these donors to part with any of their cash now. Better get that smooth operator, coo-coo Muku, a.k.a. Sri Nithya Niranjananda, to help massage their money right our their wallets.

Hey, we have an idea, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Since you already robbed the dignity from all your room service ladies, and since you thoroughly brainwashed them to do anything in the name of service to you, and since the temple is officially closed to the public, and since we know there's already a big, king size mattress in your designated 'office' quarters that probably already is showing a bit of wear and tear... Oh, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we really can't suggest that. No, siree. We don't know where that idea came from... hmmm.... maybe that came from observing you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda at that Hindu Temple in Norwalk in March 2007 where you had one of our contributors stay outside your door and guard it. Were those some pranayama breathing exercises you were doing there along with your room service lady? Sorry, we digress. There must be a better way to make some quick cash and besides, that would make the criminal case against you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, even more severe. Sorry, it was just a thought that crept into our minds. But, just the same, you're not trying to raise money that way, are you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda?

Here's a better idea, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. We think you must have had an 'investors' club going. No, not the legitimate business that one of your swamis who was known for dignity and honesty (of course, he's already left you and your cult), but you know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that informal 'investors' club' that we're just getting wind of now. Perhaps instead of 'donations' some of your big, big, investors, oops, we meant to say 'donors' along with many of your ashramites poured in a bunch of cash, perhaps maybe their entire savings, because you, Sri Nithyananda, promised them a financial return on all this cash you were scooping up. Maybe this was the 'seed' money and once their were trees, then they could all eat the fruits from those trees. Is that what you, 'Swami' Nithyananda promised them? Somehow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're getting a flashback of the story of Adam and Eve, but we can't figure out who is playing the role of the snake. There's just too many suspects. But, our idea, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if there indeed was an investor's club, perhaps you can tell them the only way they will get their money back is if they pour even more money into your hopeless money pit. We know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that these folks are already gullible. And, they are already known to give you, Sri Nithyananda, money. So, these 'donors' just might believe this new story and open up their checkbooks and write you just enough cash to get you out of this minor inconvenience. And, if your 'investors', oops, we meant to say, 'donors' seem to hesitate, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, can have them sign a ten-page contract (sound familiar?) to assure them that those who invest, oops, we meant to say 'donate' now will get a special darshan (blessings) done by 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, the Healing Swami and now Fugitive of the Law. Perhaps you can pull together a whole little packet of 'energized' goodies, like a special mala (rosary), some sandals from Wal*Mart that were worn by the Master himself (that's you, Mr. Holy man but just remember to have Sachit take the price tag off first), and other trinkets that you couldn't give away just like the packets you put together for your Healer's Initiation. And, if these 'donors' still hesitate, you can add an addendum to your contract that says that if in the 'impossible' case that the Life Bliss Foundation (or what ever of the many Foundation names you plan to use) tanks, then those that 'donate' now will be the first to get their cash back before all the creditors and law suits claim all of the assets. Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you already know you have to play hardball when making holy business deals.

The Life Bliss Investor's Club Demonstrates the Ancient Mystery of Nithyananda's Pyramid Power

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if there was an 'investors' club, then that just might explain why there is still so much loyalty to you form people who we know otherwise would have had the smarts to get out from you long ago. This explains why Sri Nithyananda Niranjananda, a true family man, would still be out trying to support you and why he is trying to get others to pour even more cash into a scheme that is proving to be a loser. But, poor guy (no pun intended), if he continues this downward spiral, he might end up in the same boat that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, are in. How will he be able to explain that to his son? Kind of a drag if he gets put into a federal prison and then only gets to see his family through security gate. We really hope that this doesn't happen to him or even to Sri Sachitananda or even Bhaktananda. These swamis are actually really good people, we just wished they started to use their brains and a little common sense. Let's wish them luck, Sri Nithyananda... Sri Nithyananda? Are you still there? Sri Nithyananda! That's not the Tamil Police!... That's just some Boy Scots asking us to buy tickets for their raffel. We'll tell them that you already gave at the office, and you can come out from under the bed now. Gee, that bed has been the center of so much trouble. Maybe 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you can start a YouTube lecture about the how beds add bad karma to people's lives and how true devotees who don't want bad karma should sleep in phone booths. Sorry, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we can see you didn't like that idea, but honestly, it isn't much better than your current batch of YouTube videos.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 134: One Hundred and thirty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 156: One hundred and fifty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

God-Fraud, Nithyananda, Denied Entry to the U.S.A. - Visa Canceled

U.S.A. Says "NO!" to Nithyananda and His Cult; Spares U.S. Citizens from Fraud

* * Breaking News * *
We just got word from reliable sources that the U.S. Embassy has canceled 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda's U.S. Visa. This is 'officially' unconfirmed, but we'll give confirmation as soon as we receive it.  Confirmed, our information source seems solid that Nithyananda Swami had his U.S. visa canceled a second time.

Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. Where have you been all this time? Oh, yes, that's right. It is a secret. Some say you've been hiding in Nepal, some say in Tamil Nadu, some say in the VIP section of some professional cricket team where all the cheerleaders hang out. We guess nobody knows for sure except your hairdresser, 'Swami' Nithyananda. We guess that adds to your mystique. But, one place that doesn't seem likely is that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda are hiding in the U.S.A. You know, Sri Nithyananda, there was a rumor that you were hanging out at Gilligan's Island, but that doesn't seem so likely right now. Look, just in:

"U.S. Embassy Cancels Nithyananda's Visa; Places Him on Watch"

'Swami' Nithyananda, we're still waiting for official confirmation, but just the same, ouch!  It looks like it is deja vu  all over again.   But, don't worry there, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're sure you can rally and get a new visa. Remember April 2, 2007 when you had your tourist visa canceled but were able to rally all of your supporters to get you a religious visa? So, you've been through this. Old hat. Oh, no, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we forgot something. This time you don't have any supporters to rally behind you. They all felt cheated and left you. So, this means you're going to have to go to the U.S. Embassy and wait in line just like everyone else. We're sure you'll meet some interesting people in line. Perhaps you might even meet some young attractive students that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, might be able to recruit for future service to your, ah, mission or research department. So, think of this as an opportunity.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, with your great ability to see everything around you, the future, the past, all dimensions, did you see this coming? Ah, we get it now. This is why you had your ashram cleared out, so you wouldn't be stuck with an extra month's rent. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, always had an eye for finances.

So, what's going to happen now, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? You know, all of those hot yoga ladies from L.A. that wear those tight spandex outfits that you were hitting on? Now, it looks like you will have to convince them to come see you in India, that is whenever you set up shop again and sit on your 24(K) gold throne. So, how are you going to convince them to come over to your place? We get it now, you'll have Bhaktananda and Medhananda recruit them for you. Hmmmm. That might not be so optimal for you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. You see, Bhaktananda seems to only be able to recruit like-minded hardcore types like professional school bus drivers and retired roller derby ladies. We don't know how happy you'll be with ladies like that. And, Medhananda, with his eye-sight, which you never healed, there's no telling what he'll send your way.  Chances are she will be able to walk and talk, but the rest just might be a guess.   It will be the new Mystery of Mysteries.   Just the same, you might want to check the ID of any ladies that Medhananda recruits for you just to make sure, that they are, ahem, at least 18.

What you need, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, is a real smooth operator who is still loyal to you who could convince people who are still sitting on the fence to jump and fall off a cliff even when these 'fence sitters' can see that it is pure insanity to support you. There's gotta be somebody. Wait! We know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you can get Sri Nithya Niranjananda, a.k.a. coo-coo Mukku. We think that he must have been a lemming in his past life, leading the pack to follow him over to the promised land. Too bad that in this life, he just became a regular old rat.  A rather large one at that.  Oh, well. But, he is a smooth operator. No doubt about that. But, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there's still a problem there. Sri Nithya Niranjananda seems to have an inclination of super-sizing everything. You, know, 128 oz. 'Big Gulp', over-sized Ford Taurus, all-you-can-eat buffets, Costco-sized portions, you know, the works with everything on it. So, Sri Nithyananda, you might want to reinforce the furniture in your pad, especially the bed, just as a precaution. We wouldn't want to see you with a broken home, even though you're a proven expert in breaking up other people's homes. No siree. But, just be ready for a really super big surprise.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, kind of a bummer that your visa got canceled. But, don't worry, Sri Nithyananda, a lot of people get their visa denied and placed on watch. We bet Bin Laden, for instance, will never know the joy of riding the Magic Dumbo ride at Disneyland either. Say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if you're visa has been denied and you've been put on the 'watch list' by the U.S. Government, does that mean your other cronies, sorry, we meant to say other swamis, like Sadhananda (Ayya), Bhaktananda, Atmamaneesha (Mr. Tiwari), Ma Bhaktika, Dheera (Martyn Williams), Ma Bharti, Sachitananda, Sevananda, Pranananda, Gnanananda, Roopananda, Ma Achalananda, Ma Arpana etc. will also be watched and denied entry? Left high and dry. Tsk. Tsk. Pity.

Hey, there, Sri Nithyananda. Don't despair. We know a way out. You need to become a famous rock star with a huge fan base, and then the U.S. Officials will have to let you in. That happens all the time. Let's see, with your singing talents, or lack of, hey, you could start up a punk rock band. Perfect. You, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda already have that stage presence. But, there is a problem. Punk rockers are known to be a bit rowdy, just like your swamis. But, the problem is that they often fight back. So, if you try to break one of your canes over someone's head, that person just might jump on stage and return the favor in kind. So, unless you're prepared for this, we don't suggest that you break stuff on people's heads any more. But, everything else about you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is perfect. So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, what shall we call your new band? Hmmm... how about "Nastyananda and the Psycho Swamis" or maybe "Swami Shim Sham and His Wham Bams". Yes, those don't sound so good to us either. Perhaps our reader, [hint, hint] will come up with some really fitting band names for you.

In the meantime, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you need to practice up on some songs so you can get a hit record. Here's a band just perfect for you, 'Swami' Nithyananda. It is an early British punk band called "Sham 69".

Yes, we know that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, could relate with a band named "Sham 69", since both words, "sham" and "69" perfectly describe your operations, to a tee.  Anyway, these fine young men also were once denied entry to the U.S.A. We don't know why. But after some hard work and convincing interviews, they were allowed into the U.S.A. to tour and spread the love and bliss that their music conjures. In fact, they wrote a song about your now shared experience about having their U.S. visa canceled titled "No Entry". What luck, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there's a YouTube video with that exact song. So, you'll know exactly how to sing it. Here it is:



and even more luck, here's the lyrics:

They wanted us to go
To New York City
But the man in the embassy
Said, "Oh, what a pity
We don't know things you done in the past
But never mind, son
Have a little puff on the grass"

They didn't want us in the U.S.A.
We didn't wanna go their anyway
They don't want us in the U.S.A., puke

Our manager said to us
"What`s all the fuss"
We said, "We don`t know
But they won`t let us go"
"What did you do to make them do this to you"
"I dunno, Boss"
Carry on puffing the grass

They didn't want us in the U.S.A.
We didn`t wanna go their anyway
They don`t want us in the U.S.A., puke x2

The press all started to ring
Asked what was happening
Our boss said, "I don't know"
But I said, "They won't let us go"
We don`t care what you think of us
This is where we live
Stick America up your arse

OK, 'Swami' Nithyananda, do you think you can sing like that? We can't wait to see the new you in action and back in the U.S.A. Sri Nithyananda, can we have your autograph? Please?

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 132: One Hundred and thirty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 154: One hundred and fifty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

The Cult of the Great Pumpkin; Nithyananda Followers Wait It Out for Fraud-God

The Peppermint Patty Experience; Nithyananda's Room Service Lady Wakes Up and Smells the Fraud; Leaves Linus Sucking His Thumb
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. How are you doing? Yes, looks like you've been up all night again. What have you been up to, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? Graveyard or room service? We hope that you didn't combine the two. That would be even creepy for your already low standards. Say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we know how much you must love Halloween, you know doing all those meditations and red chili fire rituals in the wee hours in the cemetery. And, since it's Friday night, we don't feel like doing a proper post either. So, let's watch a clip of one of our favorite Halloween specials, just to relax. Look, it's the "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown":



Wow, that Sally Brown character wasted her whole Halloween because she believed Linus, the kid who sucks his thumb, some story about the Great Pumpkin coming down and brining toys to all the good boys and girls. But, after being cheated of a special night of fun, Sally Brown wakes up to reality and leaves Linus who spent the whole night in the pumpkin patch without the aid of a red chili fire ritual to keep him warm. Finally, his no-nonsense sister, Lucy, drags him out of the pumpkin patch and to the safety of a warm bed. Ah, that's so touching.

Say, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, it just occurred us that the same thing is going on here with you. That kid sucking his thumb, that must be Bhaktananda or maybe Sachitananda, he he got some other sweet lady to believe in your fraudulent story about all the goodies that will happen if you just believe in you, and fork over a truckload of dollars, but that money thing wasn't in the movie; it's unique to your holy business model. Anyway, that young lady, Sally Brown, sure looks cute. We bet that she could be room service potential, but that cartoon had to be acceptable to little children, so we bet that probably got edited out. But just the same, when Sally Brown realized that the Great Pumpkin (that's you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, note that pumpkins are dressed in orange too) didn't materialize and make good on the promise, she got up and left that wimpy little kid. Boy, was she upset, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, she missed out on all the fun that kids in America have on Halloween. It was gone. Over. Finito. She really felt cheated. Just kind of like those room service ladies must have felt when they found out that their innocence has been robbed due to some 'tantra' experiment that they 'signed up for' in that ten-page contract. Or, like all the other youth that devoted their lives to serve in your mission felt when they realized that all of the sudden their chance to get a real education has vanished. Or like all those parent who found that their kids lives have been physically abused, sexually abused, and cheated. Or, like all those other people who no longer have homes, life savings, retirement funds, friends, family, marriages, anything... all gone.

But, lucky for Sally Brown; she got out early, and her friends were still there. But, that wimpy kid is stuck being a sanyasi (monk). 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we can tell, because that kid is clutched to his blanket just like your brainwashed sanyasis (renunciants) or clutched to their kavi (saffron) cloth. But, any way you look at it, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that kid is lost for some dream that will never happen. Yeah, like right. Waiting for the Great Pumpkin. Is that anything like your 'paramahamsa' story and your promise of an easy, if not expensive, living-enlightenment? By the way, where did you hatch that story, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda?

Lucky for that wimpy brainwashed kid, he had a big sister, Lucy, that looked after him and eventually got him back to safety. Just think, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if that wimpy kid didn't have a strong family member to pull him back into the fold, he probably would still be in that same pumpkin patch. He would have been that babbling derelict still sitting there in the mud long after all the pumpkins rotted... waiting and waiting for your stupid promise of toys and 'enlightenment' which we all know will never materialize.

Don't you think, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that it would be better if you got all your brainwashed devotees back into society and become productive and integrated again why you wait it out? After all, 'Swami' Nithyananda, it could take over 20 years before the coast is clear or your served a few life-time sentences for all the crimes that you could be prosecuted for. Wouldn't it make sense if you let your devotees rebuild their wealth? You, know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, build up that nest egg and maybe even get married and have children? If you don't let this happen, then 'Swami' Nithyananda, your brainwashed devotees that refuse to leave you will be broke with no family. The only thing that they can show you is that the drooled over the pada pooja set for over twenty years while faithfully reciting corrupted mantras every morning. That's not a lot to show for twenty-years of service. But, if they have careers again and get married, after twenty years there'll be a bunch of loot you can just scoop up which will allow you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, to order your the next round of 24(K) gold thrones. And, who knows, if your former followers have kids, a whole new generation of room service ladies can be at your disposal with eager parents vying to deliver them to your doorstep. By that time, we hope that the hidden camera technology has really improved, but for now, we just want these people to get on with their lives.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, while your biding your time with a lifestyle that's a cross between Hugh Hefner and Bin Laden, why don't you make it clear that the dream is over and that it will be a long wait, so these people can get on with their lives? Think about, 'Swami' Nithyananda, it would be nice to let these people be free especially since there's no future for them otherwise. Can you do that for them, Sri Nithyananda? Just set them free? After all, they really did trust you. Can you help them get started again, even if it is just a word of encouragement to go forward? Are you big enough to do that, 'Swami' Nithyananda? We're waiting.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 131: One Hundred and thirty-one days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 153: One hundred and fifty-three days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

Fraud-God, Nithyananda, Closes Up 'Vedic' Cult Temple (for now)

Another Crack in Fraud-God's Crumbling Empire
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. How's your USA breadbasket empire doing? Oh, we see. Instead of a 'bread basket', maybe you should call it 'dead in a casket'. Boy, that sure crumbled in a hurry. We drove by your once bustling ashram at 928 Huntington Dr, Duarte, California, and looks mighty deserted. A ghost town. But, knowing your dark tantric practices, it always was one. We don't know what type of energy the new tenants will find in your old quarters, no. 5. But, rest assured, we are pretty certain that the new tenant's bed will start shaking and there will be lots of moaning. Oh, scary.

So, what's the matter? No one wants to live there? Where's your marketing department when you need them, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? It might be a tough sell. Let's see if we can come up with a pitch. "Come live with Swami Sex Offender and experience his energy field!" No thanks. We can see why there are no takers. We're pretty sure that the landlord will be glad to get her property back and start making money again. No telling how much she lost on that deal. But, don't worry; we're sure she'll upgrade the place even if she makes it into a slumlord. You know, even tenants that have jobs now and then will contribute more to society than the tenants before them. And, if there's drug usage, those addicts are only hurting themselves. So, that's a 1000-fold improvement right there.

And, what about that Nithyananda Vedic Temple, also the Head Quarters of your Western Empire? You, know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that place you spent so much time and energy 'transforming'. So what if some people injured themselves permanently while doing your slave labor and all kinds of other weird stuff that happened there? It was your temple, with your name on it, and with your ripped off Osho logo of a Paramahamsa (which you were not). 'Swami' Nithyananda, do you remember how you used to love bragging about how much better your Vedic Temple was than compared to all the other Hindu temples? You used to love giving specific examples like the murtis (statues) in the Norwalk Sanatan Dharma Temple were ugly... how the Malibu temple was completely mismanaged... and...on...and...on...and...on. There didn't seem to be a temple any where in the U.S.A. that was up to your high standards. Only your temples were so perfect. Divinely so. Heaven on earth. Say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what's this in our inbox from Constant Contact sent by the Nithyananda Vedic Temple?:

Dear Devotees:

Beginning on Saturday, April 17 the Nithyananda Vedic Temple will be closed to the public. Our deepest thanks for your patronage over the years. We look forward to seeing you again when the temple re-opens.

With best regards,
The Administration of Nithyananda Vedic Temple

What? Closed? Are you trying to sell off the Vedic Temple to pay for all those legal fees, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? How much are bribes to all the courts these days? We're sure the going rate has increased since all those pictures of you on your 24(K) gold thrones have been showcased on your website. How many of those thrones do you have? Well, it looks like you might be out one 24(K) gold throne very soon, unless there are some devotees that want to store in their garage. Mind you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that once it is in someone's garage, there's little chance that heavy piece of bulk is ever going to be moved. So, pick your garage carefully, and hope they still have enough money after experiencing you that they are not going to lose their home any time soon.

So, really, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what's going to happen to your Vedic Temple? Are you going to just keep the temple in mothballs until you can come out from hiding? Who's going to pay the mortgage? Who's going to pay the bills? Who's going to turn the lights on and off? Maybe 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you can rent your temple out to motorcycle clubs so they can have a big party there on the weekends. That just might make your temple popular again.

Actually, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we're kind of hoping that the community will take it over and make it a real temple that the Divine would actually love to call home. Who knows, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you might actually get some good karma if that happened. Yes, it is a long shot, but who knows, even you, Sri Nithyananda, just might be capable of doing the right thing.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 130: One Hundred and thirty days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 152: One hundred and fifty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.

A Message to Past & Present Fraud-God Supporters of Nithyananda

Wake Up Call for All Former Devotees. Move Away From this Fraud and Heal!
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. How are you doing? Look what came in our inbox. It's a message to all past and present devotees, you know, the type of people who might have came to your acharya (teacher) training program or attended a two-day program with you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Let's take a look:

We come in peace. Yes, the last five weeks have been very difficult if not unsettling. Whatever has happened and your involvement in this process is not your fault, because this was all from the influence of the temporary circumstances. Yes, we can blame this on maya (illusion). It had us its grips too.

With sincerity, we would like to say that this is the time to realize the Truth and move on to the path of Dharma (righteousness). Yes, we are out of the dream state of consciousness, and I’m very sure that you are already awaken. Just listen to the divinity inside your heart. Do the right thing. And, leave this person (you know who) immediately. Please don't support his bad karma anymore.

Please understand that whatever has happened has happened for the good. Just move on with your life. This is not the time to regret. We are positive that you learned many things through this process and you can now move to the higher level of consciousness as a result from this experience.

The good news is that we all had a little experience of transcendental consciousness as a result from this learning experience. As a result, we can now move to Bliss Consciousness or God Consciousness and go beyond the emotional attachments of maya (illusion). We are now free to move about the spiritual world.

Finally, we just want to close with a small thought. Even though we might have had a difficult time with our family as a direct result with our involvement, we now can see and realize the priority that family has in our lives. From this experience, we can now look after our family members again with a real understanding of love and devotion. Yes, family and spirituality are both at home. And, there is no place like home. That is where we belong.

If there is any way that we can help, please let us know. Even if you just want to yell at us, we welcome the chance to help you with some cathartic healing. We promise to only listen.

Take care and sincerely hoping the best for you.

Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we sure hope that people wake up and heal. We imagine that many of them might think that there might be some glimmer of hope that you will come back, but the owner glimmer of hope we have is that they learned something from being around such a fake and a fraud. Sorry, there, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, but it's true. We just hope that all your former devotees go on with their lives a little bit stronger than they did before they fell into your cult trap.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 126: One Hundred and twenty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 148: One hundred and forty-eight days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.