The Cult of the Great Pumpkin; Nithyananda Followers Wait It Out for Fraud-God

The Peppermint Patty Experience; Nithyananda's Room Service Lady Wakes Up and Smells the Fraud; Leaves Linus Sucking His Thumb
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. How are you doing? Yes, looks like you've been up all night again. What have you been up to, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? Graveyard or room service? We hope that you didn't combine the two. That would be even creepy for your already low standards. Say, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we know how much you must love Halloween, you know doing all those meditations and red chili fire rituals in the wee hours in the cemetery. And, since it's Friday night, we don't feel like doing a proper post either. So, let's watch a clip of one of our favorite Halloween specials, just to relax. Look, it's the "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown":



Wow, that Sally Brown character wasted her whole Halloween because she believed Linus, the kid who sucks his thumb, some story about the Great Pumpkin coming down and brining toys to all the good boys and girls. But, after being cheated of a special night of fun, Sally Brown wakes up to reality and leaves Linus who spent the whole night in the pumpkin patch without the aid of a red chili fire ritual to keep him warm. Finally, his no-nonsense sister, Lucy, drags him out of the pumpkin patch and to the safety of a warm bed. Ah, that's so touching.

Say, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, it just occurred us that the same thing is going on here with you. That kid sucking his thumb, that must be Bhaktananda or maybe Sachitananda, he he got some other sweet lady to believe in your fraudulent story about all the goodies that will happen if you just believe in you, and fork over a truckload of dollars, but that money thing wasn't in the movie; it's unique to your holy business model. Anyway, that young lady, Sally Brown, sure looks cute. We bet that she could be room service potential, but that cartoon had to be acceptable to little children, so we bet that probably got edited out. But just the same, when Sally Brown realized that the Great Pumpkin (that's you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, note that pumpkins are dressed in orange too) didn't materialize and make good on the promise, she got up and left that wimpy little kid. Boy, was she upset, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, she missed out on all the fun that kids in America have on Halloween. It was gone. Over. Finito. She really felt cheated. Just kind of like those room service ladies must have felt when they found out that their innocence has been robbed due to some 'tantra' experiment that they 'signed up for' in that ten-page contract. Or, like all the other youth that devoted their lives to serve in your mission felt when they realized that all of the sudden their chance to get a real education has vanished. Or like all those parent who found that their kids lives have been physically abused, sexually abused, and cheated. Or, like all those other people who no longer have homes, life savings, retirement funds, friends, family, marriages, anything... all gone.

But, lucky for Sally Brown; she got out early, and her friends were still there. But, that wimpy kid is stuck being a sanyasi (monk). 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we can tell, because that kid is clutched to his blanket just like your brainwashed sanyasis (renunciants) or clutched to their kavi (saffron) cloth. But, any way you look at it, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that kid is lost for some dream that will never happen. Yeah, like right. Waiting for the Great Pumpkin. Is that anything like your 'paramahamsa' story and your promise of an easy, if not expensive, living-enlightenment? By the way, where did you hatch that story, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda?

Lucky for that wimpy brainwashed kid, he had a big sister, Lucy, that looked after him and eventually got him back to safety. Just think, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if that wimpy kid didn't have a strong family member to pull him back into the fold, he probably would still be in that same pumpkin patch. He would have been that babbling derelict still sitting there in the mud long after all the pumpkins rotted... waiting and waiting for your stupid promise of toys and 'enlightenment' which we all know will never materialize.

Don't you think, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that it would be better if you got all your brainwashed devotees back into society and become productive and integrated again why you wait it out? After all, 'Swami' Nithyananda, it could take over 20 years before the coast is clear or your served a few life-time sentences for all the crimes that you could be prosecuted for. Wouldn't it make sense if you let your devotees rebuild their wealth? You, know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, build up that nest egg and maybe even get married and have children? If you don't let this happen, then 'Swami' Nithyananda, your brainwashed devotees that refuse to leave you will be broke with no family. The only thing that they can show you is that the drooled over the pada pooja set for over twenty years while faithfully reciting corrupted mantras every morning. That's not a lot to show for twenty-years of service. But, if they have careers again and get married, after twenty years there'll be a bunch of loot you can just scoop up which will allow you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, to order your the next round of 24(K) gold thrones. And, who knows, if your former followers have kids, a whole new generation of room service ladies can be at your disposal with eager parents vying to deliver them to your doorstep. By that time, we hope that the hidden camera technology has really improved, but for now, we just want these people to get on with their lives.

So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, while your biding your time with a lifestyle that's a cross between Hugh Hefner and Bin Laden, why don't you make it clear that the dream is over and that it will be a long wait, so these people can get on with their lives? Think about, 'Swami' Nithyananda, it would be nice to let these people be free especially since there's no future for them otherwise. Can you do that for them, Sri Nithyananda? Just set them free? After all, they really did trust you. Can you help them get started again, even if it is just a word of encouragement to go forward? Are you big enough to do that, 'Swami' Nithyananda? We're waiting.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 131: One Hundred and thirty-one days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 153: One hundred and fifty-three days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.