Tuesday, April 27, 2010

God-Fraud, Nithyananda Dragged Back to Bangalore, Stalls & Calls Nurses for Room Service


Nithyananda's Transformation Blueprint: From Fraud to Fugitive to Faker to Furlough to Freedom
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. Boy, you look a bit stressed, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. We bet that you could use a little R&R to recoup and recharge yourself. We know just the place, a nice little sleepy town in the foothills of the Himalayan Mountains in Himachal Pradesh. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, will just love it. This time of year, it is so nice. Spring, birds, fresh air... and no one around to bother you... why there's even all the modern amenities such as wireless internet and cell phone coverage. Oh, my gosh! We're so sorry, 'Swami' Nithyananda. We forgot that you were busted because the CID Team was able to trace your phone number. Who do you, 'Paramahamsa' think gave them such confidential information? Sri Nithyananda, did you use this same phone to try to intimidate all those donors who recently left you after they lost their life savings to build your empire? Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we agree. Those 'ungrateful' people are still stuck in the greed factor. Just imagine, they lost their lifesavings, and they got some strong words from you that no doubt, helped remove their ego. And, just because of that, look what happens. They probably were willing to call up the CID Team or even pass your cell number on to our friend, Chandan Nandi of the Deccan Herald, who probably then passed it on to the CID Team. Wow, we guess that how news travels.

'Swami' Nithyananda, it looks like your whole house has fallen on you. Just like this classic picture from the Wizard of Oz:


No, No, No, Sri Nithyananda. That is not Ma Medhananda Mayi under that house. She is still running loose out in the West, Seattle to be exact. That definitely isn't her. We hate to tell you this, actually, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that is you stuck under there with your smelly feet exposed. You're in the East now... and well, you seemed to be crushed by the house you built. But, don't worry, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, unless someone tents the house and fumigate, we imagine that you will be able to borrow down and slither out sometime before next winter.

For the record, 'Swami' Nithyananda, let's review all of the charges that have been leveled against you, shall we?:
  • Two cases under Sections 295A (deliberate and malicious acts, intended to outrage religious feelings of any class by insulting its religion or religious beliefs)
  • 376 (punishment for rape)
  • 377 (unnatural sex)
  • 420 (cheating and dishonestly inducing delivery of property)
  • 506 (criminal intimidation) 
  • 120B (criminal conspiracy) of IPC
That's quite a collection, 'Swami' Nithyananda. Will your threatening kal bhairava emails on your confiscated computers will show up on this list? We've already reported your threats to the FBI. Just a tip from us, next time in your 10-page sex contract, be sure to include a phrase about not being married and 'available'. That might help you look like a legitimate sex-craved sanyasi (renunciant). So, where do all the other charges fit it?  Let's see there's gold smuggling, excess foreign funds on hand (just a weekend supply, no doubt), more illegal forest products including tiger skins. Say, you go all out for your room service ladies.  Were those skins for your meditation or for more 'experiments'?  We agree, 'Swami' Nithyananda.  Nothing like a hot room service lady on a tiger skin. Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, those new findings are not exactly extremely serious criminal acts. Small time stuff, like that of a petty criminal. But, we're sure that everyone knows that you did the violent crimes above, so the authorities will be able to keep you at bay until they get the evidence they need. Those crimes above should do the trick.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, to be honest, we were a bit disappointed with your arrest. We were expecting to see you sporting handcuffs. You know, without handcuffs, you might have been able to escape from the authorities and continue your YouTube career. But, looks like the tables were turned. Instead of giving them the slip, someone gave you the slipper. Did they do this because, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, had no sole? OK, we realized that was a low shot, but it was the thought that counted.

More seriously, 'Swami' Nithyananda, Foreign Exchange Management Act (FEMA) and notify the Enforcement Directorate (ED). For all the laundering you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda did, you sure didn't have a clean act. In fact, take a look at you as you were arrested:

photo source: www.daijiworld.com

Sri Nithyananda, your hair looks greasy, you're unshaved, your saffron cloth is wrinkled, and looks like you haven't slept all night. Why 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you look just like an ashramite! Welcome to our world, when we were brainwashed slaves of course. Is this your karma coming around? Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, let's hope not. Let's pray that the police don't break canes over your head and throw furniture on you like you did to your ashramites to beat them into a brainwashed submission. That would be very cruel.

'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we heard the CID team was very nice to you. In fact, they even cleaned and fixed the toilet in your 8' by 5' cell. Wow nice of them. Perhaps that preparation was for their benefit, though. They must have watched your YouTube channel and knew that if that 'content' couldn't be flushed down and then the stench got into their air conditioning unit, it would be torture for them. We're beginning to catch on to their logic in receiving you, Sri Nithyananda. And, we understand, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that the CID Team went out of their way to make your feel at home. Why they even installed a little camera and a one-way mirror. But, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, don't get too excited. This isn't going to be the type of bar and grill you're used to. Quite different, we're sure.

And, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is your little cell nice and clean? Is the mattress they slip in during nap hours to your standards? We hope that everything is to your liking, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Just imagine that if there were head lice that infested your hair, then they would have to shave [hint, hint] everything off, well maybe not everything. Wow, Sri Nithyananda, we bet if they shaved your head, then you would look just like a common criminal, exactly like Bhaktananda. By the way, how is he? Oh, that's right, we heard that he's no longer in the air-conditioned lock up but in jail for a couple of weeks. That ought to cool him off, or will it? Anyway, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if they do shave your head like Bhaktananda, do you think we'll be able to see that little birthmark that looks like a '9-9-9' symbol upside down! And, if you didn't have that birthmark, then do you think that at least one of the good-natured interrogators would be willing to tattoo that symbol on you just for authenticity?

Wait a minute, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there's smoke coming from our computer and sulfur fumes belching out. Yuck. Disgusting. Look, an email from The Devil! And, the email is written in crimson blood. Boy, we didn't know that it was possible to send an email written in blood, but here it is:
Dear Blog Owner,

Sorry to say that I am very offended by your humor.  Please note, as the caretaker of pure evil, I want you to be aware that Nithyananda Swami does not meet my already very low standards.  Just like Osho, I don't claim to be anything that I'm not.  In this way, Nithyananda Swami, has tried to hide all of his shame behind a veneer of holiness.  Nithyananda Swami is undeserving to be associated with our registered up-side-down 9-9-9™ symbol. Any further violations of our Registered Trademark, and I will make sure that the search engine ranking for this site sinks to the bowels of Nithyananda's abode.  Have a nice day.

Yours cordially,  The Devil
Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we've gotten all kinds of threats from all kinds of characters, but this was the first time that The Devil has threaten us. We guess that even The Devil will have to go to the back of an already very long line if he wants to sue us or do anything to stop us. Sorry, no special treatment; not even for your peers, Sri Nithyananda. But, wait a minute, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what's this criticism here?:
"Only a house-holder is entitled for tantric sex. Claiming to be a monk and using so many people for one's pleasure is unpardonable,"

"(Nithyananda) has violated UNAIDS guidelines as well as the rules of tantra."

“He (Nithyananda) should have had one partner and announced himself as a tantric guru. It has caused damage to the faith of people in the institution and traumatized many.”
Who said that, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda? Oh, that was Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. Wait at minute, that makes two devils in one day!  It was bad enough that The Devil condemns you, but when you have a truly evil, cult personality and renown closet womanizer, like Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, come out and publicly denounce you, then you know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you really need to get your marketing team in overdrive. Otherwise, donations are going to dry up into the bottomless pit you seemed to dig for yourself in, and then you'll have no choice but to sell your ashram and other assets to Sri Sri at a fire and brimstone sale rate. Scandalous.

So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, how are you going to recover from this setback? Oh, we see, you're going to start a campaign to have everyone recite a mantra for your acquittal. How enchanting.  And, you're actually going to lead by example. How innovative.  We're not used initiative from you, Sri Nithyananda. Which mantra are you going to use? Oh, yes, your standard house mantra:
Om Hrim Nithyananda
But, wait a minute, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, there are only about sixty people in the world that are still willing to say that mantra. But, don't worry, 'Swami' Nithyananda; there's close to six million people still willing to chant for you. But, Sri Nithyananda, you'll have to modify your mantra just a bit. Don't worry, it will still be close to your original mantra, but just slightly different. Here it is:
Om H-Ream it up your backside, Nithyananda
Since you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, seem so at ease changing sacred mantras to substitute your name, we knew that you wouldn't mind this slight alteration. It kind of makes it a little more joyful to say. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, should give it try. We would like to see you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, smile again. Honest. It gives us great joy to imagine the CID Team telling you again and again to wipe that stupid smirk off your face. Oh, don't cry on us. Boo Hoo. Really Sri Nithyananda, we've seen crocodiles with more sincerity.

Just think, Sri Nithyananda, in a two days, you'll be back on that 24(K) golden throne in your ashram waiting for a nice afternoon massage on your bed without any more surveillance cameras. Of course, with Bhaktananda in jail, you might have to give yourself that massage, but we know you'll manage somehow. So, just forty-eight hours of CID interrogation. That should be easy for you. In your book, Formless in Form, page 44, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, mentioned how you withstood days of doing the panchtapas (fire meditation), that in your own words:
"So extreme was this penance that none but the most courageous even attempted it."
And, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda go on to say how you were surrounded and went down, down, down, in ring a fire... and the flames got higher (just like Johny Cash) and placed a pot of smoldering embers on your head to boot. Wow! That must have been tough. And, then just to make sure you could outdo Clint Eastwood, in the same book you mention about doing the 'dreaded' traatak mediation where you would stare at the sun all day long without blinking. So, the withstanding the rigors of talking to a few non-brainwashed souls that do not carry your certificates of 'enlightenment' especially after being cooped in with the likes of Bhaktananda, should be a piece of cake.

So, what is this? Chest pain? Are you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, trying to say that the CID Team put the squeeze on your chest? We all know that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda were very good at doing that do others, especially after watching those videos. Is this part those karmic returns? If you really had chest pains, why weren't you able to heal them?  After all, in Formless in Form on page 44, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, talk about how you broke your back on a truck ride in an army truck from Tapovan, and how you healed your back with your own hands to the amazement of the doctors. 'Swami' Nithyananda, did you heal your back, but forgot to heal your spine? We don't understand. After all, in all your books, you included the article of "A Mind of a Mystic" which included all of those test results from some doctors in Oklahoma in 2005.  From this study, you, Sri Nithyananda clinically 'proved' your ability to control your brainwaves from the results indicated from Positron Emission Tomography (PET) device. The gushing doctor talked about how you effortlessly moved into the 'pleasure zone' by simply meditating at will:
"I believe the PET scan revealed what I call the brain's 'D-spot'. Whether you consider the 'D' in D-spot to stand for Delight, the Divine or even Dopamine (the chemical through which our bodies experience pleasure), initial indications are that the meditation can stimulate it."
So, Sri Nithyananda, why then did the medical results for your chest pains come back as 'negative'? Weren't you able to heal yourself? 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, were you faking it because all those chats with CID Officers were too much for you and it made you cry? Really? 'Swami' Nithyananda, where did you learn this behavior? I couldn't have been from any of your room service ladies. We doubt that any of them ever said, "Not tonight dear, I have a headache." So, where did you learn this? Oh, yes, one of our loyal readers gave a plausible explanation that you learned this from watching TV while, you, Sri Nithyananda, would go into samadhi (trance) and do tantric 'experiments', while you were not feeling well, of course. Yes, if you weren't watching TV, it would have just seemed like regular sex. But, now we know that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda were really not that interested in the sex, so you must have watched TV in a way to unclutch your mind while distributing all of that tantric energy. Anyway, Sri Nithyananda, next time you do this type of healing meditation, we suggest that you watch some educational television, instead of those cheap crime thrillers. After all, James Cagney as well as tips from Cosmopolitan [source:IBN-Live] are not the ideal roll model for a real genuine 'parmahamsa'.

OK, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we'll give you the benefit of the doubt.  So, let's just assume that you weren't faking it. Just the same, we're still confused, Sri Nithyananda. If you're able to heal yourself, quickly get into the 'pleasure zone', and can stand the rigors of the toughest of tapas (penance meditations), then why did you still go to the hospital? Now we get it; room service ladies in nurse's outfits. Yes, that makes sense. Did they take your temperature with a banana? Well, they should have and filmed it too. That way, you would have had visual to show everybody if you ever try to tell that joke again. Sorry, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we hate to bust your fantasy, but as you probably found out, real nurses don't dress or behave that way.  We know, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda probably got those ideas from your DVD collection, but it is always good to become aligned with your reality.

Sri Nithyananda, have you ever thought about writing a book from all of these recent experiences as a fugitive and now as an inmate? We think a titled called "Common Criminal Behavior to Uncommon Criminal Acts" just might capture the essence of your new life story. We'll be sure to purchase a copy and write a favorable review for it. We can't wait to read the upcoming chapters.  We'll be waiting.

Latest Headlines:
Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 142: One Hundred and forty-two days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 164: One hundred and sixty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.
at 38 comments:

Friday, April 23, 2010

Stop Nithyananda's Fraud; Please Come Forward


Victims, Please Come Forward and Prevent Others From Suffering Your Fate
We interrupt our normal blog style to ask all the victims of Nithyananda's fraud to come forward and tell the Criminal Investigation Department (CID) your story. We are at the tipping point of a long journey. At this juncture, we could either gain a legal conviction against Nithyananda and his cult or Nithyananda can be acquitted due to a lack of witnesses.


Please, please, please, for the sake of humanity, this is your time to come forward and prevent others from having the unfortunate fate they we shared. The CID Team has expressed concerns that not enough witnesses have come forward to reach a judgment against Nithyananda. The case, as it is right now, is weak. Not weak due to moral grounds; not weak due to allegations, but weak due to too many other people think that someone else will do the job for them. The strength to stop all of these wrongs comes from the ones who are reading these words now. This is the time to act. There is only a few more days that Nithyananda can be held in remand (jail) unless someone comes forward. If not, Nithyananda will be back on his 24(K) throne, making more brainwashing YouTube videos, and calling more mesmerized ladies to give him more of his tantric room service experiments.

Therefore, if you have any sense of moral values as well as have information that will be of interest to the CID team, please, please, please come forward.

The CID Team needs this information:
  1. The crime needed to happen on Indian soil. If you received fraudulent sales calls or threats from India but received them in North America or Malaysia, please come forward.
  2. Victims of Nithyananda's tantric experiments.   These were just wrong and unwholesome.  No one should have to go through what you went through.  Please help prevent other people from suffering the same abuse.  Please help other victims of the past to heal.  But, only you can do this.
  3. If you have information on the financial dealings of Nithyananda's fraud, please come forward.  Do not discount anything.  If you have a receipt for a Shiva Lingam that was supposed to be installed, but never was, and if you have the receipt for this 'donation', please come forward.  The CID Team needs your help.
To all the ladies that were victims to Nithyananda's tantric experiments, please gather your strength.  This is the time to act.  We have spoken directly with the Banglore CID Team in charge of investigating Nithyananda,  both Sri KN Yogappa and top CID Administrator.  They are men of their word.  They have promised that anyone coming forward will be treated with dignity and respect.  They have female police officers that you will be able  to confide with and tell your story if sharing your story with a man is too difficult.  The top CID Administrator has promised that your identity will be protected.  That your testimonial will remain confidential.  He also promised that anyone coming forward will receive police protection against any harassing or physical threats that Nithyananda and his rowdy swamis might try to use to intimidate you.  You will not be alone.


Furthermore, top CID Administrator promised that anyone who becomes a witness (also known as an approver) will not be prosecuted for any legal irregularities that might have occurred on your side.  Yes, Nithyananda and his crafty management led by the likes of Swami Nithya Sadhananda, must certainly tried to intimidate you and threaten you.  Do not worry.  The one-sided ten-page contract is illegal and void.  It will only be used against them, not you.  Even if you helped bring others to receive Nithyananda, your innocence will be maintained.  And, even the few that helped schedule these encounters for Nithyananda, as long as you come forward now, your innocence  will be maintained.  You will be protected, and your innocence is guaranteed.  Yes, this is both the time to forgive and to act.  Unfortunately, this is a shrinking window, one that the opportunity to come forth and do the right thing is vanishing.  We only have a few days more.  We really need your help, to do the right thing, and to bring this heinous crime to an end.  No one, including you, should have to go through this.  Please act now.

On a personal level, we at this blog and the team that we have collected will try our best to make your life good again.  We expressed our opinion of all the ladies who have fallen victim to Nithyananda on our blog post two weeks ago:
Respecting the Victims of Nithyananda, the Fraud-God, & His Cult
We haven't changed.  We will never change.  Our opinion of you will only go up if you can come forward now and help the CID team.  Sorry, there isn't much we can offer in terms of compensation or reward.  But, as soul brothers, we will try to look after you if you would like our help.  If you are single and a victim of Nithyananda's crimes, we know that there are a lot of men who will worship you and want to marry you just as you are.  These men value the strength of a woman who can come forward and take the dharmic action and be bold when society norms pressure the weak to look the other way.  True spiritual beings love those that have the fearlessness to face down evil and ensure that it is stopped.  Many really good men are out there that will hold you so high that they will never let you down.  They know that they could never get anyone better in life than someone like you.  These men are not interested in dowries, societal approval, and other material nonsense.  They want solid partners to go forward in life, to have a mother of their children that will teach their children the same qualities that you demonstrated.  To these people, there is no stigma, only glory.  We cannot promise you a match, but we will promise you, as our sister, that we will look and network tirelessly for you, if you want us to do so.


So, please, we ask all victims of Nithyananda's crimes, please come forward and let the CID teams hear your story.  Good things happen to those that uphold dharma.

Here's the information again:
Report A Fraud-god
Karnataka:
Contact: Sri KN Yogappa, Superintendent of Police (CID-Special Inquiry)
Int'l Tel: 011 91 94-808-00123
Int'l Fax: 011 91 80-223-81894
In India Tel: 9480800123
In India Fax: 080-22381894
Mail Address: Carlton House, Palace Road, Bangalore – 560 001

Tamil Nadu:

Good News! Tamil Nadu has re-opened the case and wants to hear from you. Best to inform both the Karnataka CID and the Tamil Nadu CID Teams.  (The Karnataka CID Team is urgent.)
Website: Criminal Branch, Criminal Investigation Department of Tamil Nadu (CBCID)
At this website, all the contact information to make a criminal complaint and press charges against 'Swami' Nithyananda are right there: email addresses, phone numbers, and mail addresses, etc.  Be mail a signed original, preferably notarized, to them, just to make it nice and legal.
May the Divine Mother bless everyone.  Jai Maa.
Latest Headlines:
Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.
at 110 comments:

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Cult of the La La Land Hides the Fraud of Nithyananda via YouTube


Terrorist Quality YouTube Videos Just Keep Coming - and Will Be Used As Evidence Against Nithyananda
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda.  Wow, looks like your video making days are on hold for a while.  Does that mean we'll get a break from your constant barrage of psycho-babble from your 'Life Bliss' Channel on YouTube?  Oh, heavens.  Looks like all of your hardcore disciples did learn one thing from you... that is how to capture their ramblings and make a YouTube video.  It's like as if the Energizer Bunny  multiplied several times over and created a whole army of self-winding, never stopping battery-babbling operated toys.  And, they all had the same reprogrammed software and hardware.  Now, who do you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, did all that transformation?


Lets' look at all of these videos for just a moment.  Let's see.  There's the round up of about nine of your seriously brainwashed ashramites giving testimonials about how happy they are in La La Land and how the big bad media is causing all these lies.  Looks like like a case study of brainwashing.  Not a free thought anywhere. Perhaps not even a thought.  Wonder where all the other ashramites who rediscovered their senses and ability to reason are? If this most blissful place on earth was actually true, then where are all those people who escaped?  Don't forget that nearly a thousand 'blissful' people in Jonestown drank cyanide laced cherry flavored Kool Aide.  Believe it or not, the Jonestown ladies even willingly fed this 'enlightenment' juice to their own babies as they watched foam churn out of their young innocent mouths, and then these mothers guzzled down a lethal dose themselves.

Then next up on the cue is piranha lady.  Dig those bulging eyes and mouth that seems to bite with every breath.  We thought she was about to swim out from our monitor and attack us.  So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is this 'transformation' the results someone can expect from following your teachings?  Wow, thanks for confirming to the world.  Our reply is "No thanks!"


OK, Sri Nithyananda, you can view the real Life Bliss Piranha here.  Just don't get too close:



Then, in the same video, the spiritual terrorists parade their own children to become part of the support network for a sexual  predator.  We haven't seen that maneuver since Saddam Hussein displayed captured kids giving him a big hug on the eve of the first Gulf War.  And, then the hit parade just keeps coming... full of refugees from your now defunct LA temple and old ladies who have no where else to go.  So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if you have no where else to go, and a bunch of your landlords / captors shoved a microphone in front of you, what would you say?

And, then in the same video, the Canadian contingency steps in.  Let see, there's Nithyanadna Dheera, a.k.a. Martyn Williams, Ma Munivati, a.k.a. Antonie Vanmerlin, and not featured, but present, Ma Ananda Bharati, a.k.a. Sharon Kasic.  Yes, these are kind and gentle souls that are completely brainwashed.  We remember that Nithyananda Dheera must have been one of the masterminds (sarcastic irony) behind this winner of a defunct blog:
http://nithyananda-cult-clarity.blogspot.com
that hasn't been updated since last year.  The ironic final posting was 'Truth Requires No Embellishment'.  We thought that are more appropriate title would be 'Truth Requires No Embarrassment'.   If you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, look to the right hand side, you can see one of the supporters of this blog is the ice cream man with icicles dripping on his frozen-over brain.  Yes, that's Dheera.

So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, what type of visa are these Canadian followers who are staying permanently in your ashram on?  In most countries, any type of work whether it is paid or not-for-pay (volunteer) work is strictly prohibited on a tourist visa.  Is this the case in India?  Attention, Sri KN Yogappa and the CID Team, you can get three boneheads in one bag if you act quickly.  Don't worry there, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we've done our part and reported these Canadians to the United States Immigration and Customs Enforcement (US ICE) Agency, so, they should save themselves the trouble and only purchase one-way tickets back to Canada, eh?

Moving on up the YouTube playlist, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we see that you had one of your prized acharya (marketing specialist)  Pretty Boy Floyd, a.k.a. Sri Nithya Gnanananda, a.k.a. Mr. Noble, flaunt his straightened locks as any manicured true sanyasi (renunicant) would have done, but it looks like he has renounced eyeshadow and lipstick at least for this photo shoot.



Sri Nithyananda, is this your sex offending dentist at the ashram that only does his drilling at night? On only selected molars?  'Swami' Nithyananda, we have to admit that there seems to be a tired but content serene look on Gnanananda's face.  Kind of like the look we might expect to see on Hugh Hefner after he has had a long night of taking inventory at his mansion.  Oh, well, with you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, not in the picture anymore, someone needs to comfort all those ladies, all those sad ladies, all those deprived ladies, all those lonely ladies, that everything will be OK and they will continue to still receive your fulfillment and special energy even when you're not a around.   It's a tough job with long hours, but someone has to do it.  Perhaps Gnanananda is secretly hoping that your detention will be extended so he can get some extra practice in for his new role.


Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, and this video just came in.  Is this the articulate way that your brand of enlightenment will deliver?  Public speaking by Ghost Masters?  Frightening.  'Swami' Nithyananda, are you sure he's not high on marijuana? Four minutes into the video, even the photographer gets bored and starts fidgeting with the camera.



'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you seem to have quite an impact on this chap.  At 4:40, we find out that your transformation makes people so they are not even afraid of 'a cold bath in the morning' in the steamy tropics!  Now, he's "not even afraid of catching cold.... and these things are not such a big deal."  Wow, Sri Nithyananda, now that is a total transformation.  Where can we sign up? And, 'Swami' Nithyananda, he really thinks we should all experience your energy first hand. To be honest, it's not your hands that we worried about. 

Then finally, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we have the crown jewel of your testimonial YouTube videos.  It is an outsider who knew you from your shared Ramakrishna Mission days.  Let's take a look:



Wow, we were sure surprised at the title:
"Nithyananda's Brother Disciple at Sri Ramakrishna Ashram Speaks"
We thought for certain that this was someone from the Ramakrishna Mission supporting you. We didn't think that anyone from the Ramakrishna Mission could be supporting you after you stole a true Paramahamsa's works, after you degraded the title of Paramahamsa, after you lied about your association with the Ramakrishna Mission, after you called time and time again that the Ramakrishna Mission was a "dead institution", that was "very bureaucratic",  and "rife with hierarchy". We know the career caretakers of the Ramamkrishna Mission were forgiving souls, but they are also defenders of the Truth. So, it came to a shock that someone from such an established institution of wholesome goodness would be a willing participant of propaganda propping up a 'Porno-mahamsa' (thank you, loyal reader for this great line). Then we realized that this sincere looking chap with the freshly washed dhoti (traditional prayer clothes) was not actually in the Ramakrishna Mission any more. In fact, he mentioned that he was there for nine years. Say, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, nine years at the Ramakrishna Mission? Doesn't the Ramakrishna Mission only gave out sanyasi (monk) initiation after ten years? So, why would someone stay with the organization nine years and then stop short of going the full ten years? Was this his idea to stop or the Ramakrishna Mission's idea to stop? Looking at his inability to discern Truths, we have a strong idea of which scenario was most likely.

Anyway, 'Swami' Nithyananda, the part of the video which we all thought made it a classic was exactly at 0:30 (thirty seconds) into the video.
"He was actually with me (in the Ramamkrishan Order) from 1995 to 1999."
There we go. Right to our findings. Of course, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, then hiked up to Belur at the Ramakrishna Order before you left in a huff somewhere in the year 2000. But, for 1995 to 1999, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, were at the Ramakrishna Mission in Chennai. Yet, another testimonial. Your friend, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, went on to say how you had the responsibilities of looking after the kitchen department. But, you, Sri Nithyananda, said that you spent your wandering years going in and out of different monasteries. Well, if you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, were looking after the kitchen department, then those poor monks might have been on prolonged and permanent fast. Yes, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, would have been noticed if you were missing, eve if it was just for a few hours. Then at 3:10 of the video, your former roommate said that you decided to become a wandering monk, thereby bypassing the Belur Matt days. Oh, how time erases memory. So, according to him, you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda started your wandering in 1999. Do you, Sri Nithyananda, still claim this to be nine-years of wandering? Seven-years of wandering? Six-years of wandering? Most recently, over thirteen-years of wandering? All starting from 1999? Wow, that time continuum zone must have been one busy place.

Well, 'Swami' Nithyananda. We really can't blame your friend for giving such an enthusiastic testimonial about the amazing life of a real, genuine Paramahamsa. No siree. What amazes us is that your video team who have certain edited this video along with all your other videos must have heard from time to time, again and again, about all of your stories of wandering.  Didn't they have the common sense to edit that damning portion out? Now we can see that this one particular video has been edited and doesn't quite look like the terrorist quality videos that has become your standard production line since you decided to skip town and go into a vow of silence.  This  video, in contrast, was smoothly transitioned and edited nicely. So, there certainly wasn't the lack of ability or lack of time not to edit that portion out. Therefore, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we can conclude that your video team had their perceptions so bent that they only can hear things in only in terms of 'is this for our Master, Nithyananda' or 'is this against our master, Nithyananda'. No other criteria of discrimination seems to exists. Your followers cannot even recognize even simple numbers that make you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, look like a fool.  'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, could this be seen as brainwashing?

Latest Headlines:
Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 137: One Hundred and thirty-seven days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 159: One hundred and fifty-nine days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.
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Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Fraud-God Sex Swami Nithyananda Arrested in Himachal Pradesh


You Are Busted!
'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda has been charged with four sections of the Indian Penal Code:
1) Section 295: Defiling a place of worship (including putting his picture everywhere)

2) Section 420:  Cheating and Fraud (for conducting 'holy' business as usual)

3) Section 376:  Rape and other hanky-panky

4) Section 377:  Unnatural sex with minors and goats. Bahhhhhumbug.
Looks like the police got quite a haul in its net.  After bagging one big bird, a paramahamsa, no doubt, the police got three turkeys and one vulture:
1. Parananda
2. Atmamaneesha (Mr. Tiwari)
3. Arpit
4. Bhaktananda (Mr. Gopal Sheelum Reddy)
(We're waiting confirmation on these arrests.) Sorry, you guys.  But when you sleep with a dog, you're bound to get fleas.  Updated possible list includes:
1. Nithya Sanatanananda
2. Arpit (Armpit) Sangil
3. Arun Raj
4. Bhaktananda (Mr. Gopal Sheelum Reddy)
Just like the old saying, a bird in the hand, is worth a self-proclaimed-paramahamsa in the bush. But, we saw that in the video already.



Latest Headlines:
Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 136: One Hundred and thirty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 158: One hundred and fifty-eight days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.
at 80 comments:

Monday, April 19, 2010

Warrant Issued for Fraud-God, Nithyananda, Sachit's Last Stand & Investor's Club


It's Official, Slammer Time for Sex Swami, Nithyananda, Fugitive from the Law - Warrant Issued for His Arrest - Plus Updates on Cult's Unsavory Fraud
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. What's new? We don't care about your latest YouTube video, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. It's morning here in the United States, and we need to wake up. In fact, we think that you might need to wake up too, 'Swami' Nithyananda, and smell the coffee grinds. Hey, look, just in.
FLASH NEWS: CONFIRMED, ARREST WARRANT ISSUED FOR NITHYANANDA
Look, Sri Nithyananda, here's the full article on our favorite (not your favorite) newspaper, the Deccan Herald. 
Warrant Against Nithyananda
Gee, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you sure made Chandan Nandi, the reporter for the Deccan Herald, one busy man. He probably doesn't get to see his family because of you. But, that's nothing new.

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're still getting all the details, but looks like an arrest warrant was issued against you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, for failing to appear in a court in Sriperumbudur near Chennai, Tamil Nadu. Oh, oh, Sri Nithyananda, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police will now have to execute the warrant? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can go after you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, and arrest you? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can drag your smelly tush and produce it along with the rest of you before the court of law to hear the cheating case against you? 'Swami' Nithyananda, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police can cross the state borders to look for you? And, does this mean that the Tamil Nadu Police do not have to wait for some very slow moving Chief Minister of Karnataka who seems to be sitting on his hands and just go and nab you? Perhaps now there will be a little momentum for other states to rush and file arrest warrants against you. Gee, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, this could become like an Easter Egg hunt. Are you still hiding in Nepal? Then, this could be come an international Easter Egg hunt, perhaps for one rotten egg.


Wow, Sri Nithyananda, do you remember how you used to wear the holy saffron cloth and then change into some really wild outfits. Back and forth. What ever you felt like wearing, you wore. The same went for your Swamis. If it suited them to be in white, they wore white. If it suited them to be in jeans, they wore jeans. That sanyasi tradition was really just like another skin to be added to the chameleon collection. And, yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you proved that wearing holy saffron is a real turn on to some ladies, it works better than spandex. But, if things keep on going as they are going, we're sure that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, will be wearing only saffron for years to come and nothing else. Hey, look, 'Swami' Nithyananda, here's a picture of your new holy uniform now:


'Swami' Nithyananda, this arrest warrant seems like very bad news. Will we still be seeing a bunch of new YouTube videos featuring that sick little giggle of yours? Just think, Sri Nithyananda, now there will be a whole new list palms you will need to grease, and just a little dab of your snake oil is not going to do it. You, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, will need some serious cash. But, don't worry, there, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we bet that your criminal, criminal lawyer will be happy to add the additional new business that you'll be giving him. Just a tip from us, be sure to pay him first. Looks like you'll be needing his services for some time to come.


So, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, what are you going to do about this? Looks like your cash cow in Los Angeles has laid an egg and is closed. Where are you going to find the money to get you out of this? Oh, it's confirmed that you sent out your Public Relations Expert, Sri sometimes-Swami 'Stonewall' Sachitananda, a.k.a. Siva Vallabhaneni, to the rescue. Wasn't that the same person that released that video of himself leisurely leaning back and telling how blissful life was at your ashram the day after parts of it were burned down? Looks like Sachitananda is trying to corral all the fence-sitting donors and wrestle control of your now-closed temple in Los Angeles. Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, you sure are giving Sachitananda a real challenge. Imagine what it's like for him to say that Swami will take care, and this is just a test to see who really is deserving of your 'enlightenment' and your 'grace' while news flashes race across the satellite TV and websites stating that a warrant is out for the arrest of now fugitive 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda for failing to manifest himself in court after offending religious sentiments and carrying out unsavory acts while wearing holy saffron cloth. It's going to take a team effort to get these donors to part with any of their cash now. Better get that smooth operator, coo-coo Muku, a.k.a. Sri Nithya Niranjananda, to help massage their money right our their wallets.

Hey, we have an idea, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Since you already robbed the dignity from all your room service ladies, and since you thoroughly brainwashed them to do anything in the name of service to you, and since the temple is officially closed to the public, and since we know there's already a big, king size mattress in your designated 'office' quarters that probably already is showing a bit of wear and tear... Oh, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we really can't suggest that. No, siree. We don't know where that idea came from... hmmm.... maybe that came from observing you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda at that Hindu Temple in Norwalk in March 2007 where you had one of our contributors stay outside your door and guard it. Were those some pranayama breathing exercises you were doing there along with your room service lady? Sorry, we digress. There must be a better way to make some quick cash and besides, that would make the criminal case against you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, even more severe. Sorry, it was just a thought that crept into our minds. But, just the same, you're not trying to raise money that way, are you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda?

Here's a better idea, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. We think you must have had an 'investors' club going. No, not the legitimate business that one of your swamis who was known for dignity and honesty (of course, he's already left you and your cult), but you know, 'Swami' Nithyananda, that informal 'investors' club' that we're just getting wind of now. Perhaps instead of 'donations' some of your big, big, investors, oops, we meant to say 'donors' along with many of your ashramites poured in a bunch of cash, perhaps maybe their entire savings, because you, Sri Nithyananda, promised them a financial return on all this cash you were scooping up. Maybe this was the 'seed' money and once their were trees, then they could all eat the fruits from those trees. Is that what you, 'Swami' Nithyananda promised them? Somehow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, we're getting a flashback of the story of Adam and Eve, but we can't figure out who is playing the role of the snake. There's just too many suspects. But, our idea, 'Swami' Nithyananda, if there indeed was an investor's club, perhaps you can tell them the only way they will get their money back is if they pour even more money into your hopeless money pit. We know, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, that these folks are already gullible. And, they are already known to give you, Sri Nithyananda, money. So, these 'donors' just might believe this new story and open up their checkbooks and write you just enough cash to get you out of this minor inconvenience. And, if your 'investors', oops, we meant to say, 'donors' seem to hesitate, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, can have them sign a ten-page contract (sound familiar?) to assure them that those who invest, oops, we meant to say 'donate' now will get a special darshan (blessings) done by 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, the Healing Swami and now Fugitive of the Law. Perhaps you can pull together a whole little packet of 'energized' goodies, like a special mala (rosary), some sandals from Wal*Mart that were worn by the Master himself (that's you, Mr. Holy man but just remember to have Sachit take the price tag off first), and other trinkets that you couldn't give away just like the packets you put together for your Healer's Initiation. And, if these 'donors' still hesitate, you can add an addendum to your contract that says that if in the 'impossible' case that the Life Bliss Foundation (or what ever of the many Foundation names you plan to use) tanks, then those that 'donate' now will be the first to get their cash back before all the creditors and law suits claim all of the assets. Yes, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you already know you have to play hardball when making holy business deals.

The Life Bliss Investor's Club Demonstrates the Ancient Mystery of Nithyananda's Pyramid Power

Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, if there was an 'investors' club, then that just might explain why there is still so much loyalty to you form people who we know otherwise would have had the smarts to get out from you long ago. This explains why Sri Nithyananda Niranjananda, a true family man, would still be out trying to support you and why he is trying to get others to pour even more cash into a scheme that is proving to be a loser. But, poor guy (no pun intended), if he continues this downward spiral, he might end up in the same boat that you, 'Swami' Nithyananda, are in. How will he be able to explain that to his son? Kind of a drag if he gets put into a federal prison and then only gets to see his family through security gate. We really hope that this doesn't happen to him or even to Sri Sachitananda or even Bhaktananda. These swamis are actually really good people, we just wished they started to use their brains and a little common sense. Let's wish them luck, Sri Nithyananda... Sri Nithyananda? Are you still there? Sri Nithyananda! That's not the Tamil Police!... That's just some Boy Scots asking us to buy tickets for their raffel. We'll tell them that you already gave at the office, and you can come out from under the bed now. Gee, that bed has been the center of so much trouble. Maybe 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you can start a YouTube lecture about the how beds add bad karma to people's lives and how true devotees who don't want bad karma should sleep in phone booths. Sorry, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we can see you didn't like that idea, but honestly, it isn't much better than your current batch of YouTube videos.

Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Day 134: One Hundred and thirty-four days have passed since Sri Nithyananda's bloggers of the Parallel Universe of La-La Land have not answered our simple chronological questions. We'll keep on reminding them.

Day 156: One hundred and fifty-six days have passed since Sri Nithyananda and his organizations have threatened a baseless lawsuit against us. We'll keep on counting.
at 29 comments: