Nithyananda Manhandling His Own Case: Verdict Guilty!

Sex Swami Nithyananda Holds a Press Conference to Play Victim Again; Smells of Desperation
Hi there, Sri Nithyananda. How are you doing? "Rrrrabba Rrrrabba." Well, OK, you had a big day at your press conference, and perhaps even you, 'Swami' Nithyananda are a little tired of speaking, but not as tired as our ears, that's for certain.

Hmmmm. Looks like we have two stories, as usual. There's the press story and then there's the direct news from La La Land story (that's your story, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda). But, don't worry, Sri Nithyananda, we're into fairness. And, we'll entertain both stories, especially since your story is very entertaining. Here they are:

1. Deccan Herald (February 24, 2011): Nithyananda Devotees Held

2. Nithyananda.org (February 24, 2011): One More Atrocity by CID & Police against Nithyananda Ashramites

Yes, Sri Nithyananda, we liked to read your story the best. Clearly the winner. Our favorite part was this portion:

"...the CID (Police Team), as a last resort, is trying to create a charge of illegal possession of drugs against Paramahamsa Nithyananda by secretly planting marijuana packets on the campus."

Wow, 'Swami' Nithyananda, we're sure glad that all your ashramites have gotten a chance to see you do one of your famous tantric fire rituals where actual marijuana seeds are used (well, they sure looked like marijuana seeds to us). We bet that you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, did that just to educate your flock about the dangerous of marijuana seed planting especially inside your ashram. That would have been hard to believe that the police would come and do that, but since you, 'Swami' Nithyananda and all your locked up followers always uphold the truth and never ever deviate one little iota from the truth, then we'll have to believe you. Maybe 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, they were just sowing their wild seeds. Kind of like what you, 'Swami' Nithyananda did with your married girlfriend, Ranjitha. Also to add more validity to your claims, now that you have all of your ashramites doing pranayama (yogic breathing exercises) for a change, those channels and esoteric abilities of being able to see through police pockets and able to smell marijuana seeds from far away must have blossomed. Truly psychic. We bet now that anyone will think twice before they come to your ashram with a packet of marijuana seeds, unless of course they are invited to join you in a tantric fire ritual.

And, look at the Deccan Herald article, Sri Nithyananda. It has information about how the CID Police team wanted just to get a signature sample from your very first ashramite, Ma Nithya Sadhananda, a.k.a. Ms. D Jamunarani. Wow, she must be famous. 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, isn't she the one that co-signed all of your NDA Sex contracts to make sure that your victims would feel roped in to a legally binding statement and completely helpless if they sought any recourse? Why of course it is. Here's one of those pesky contracts that Sri Sachitananda didn't get a chance to destroy right now:

Co-Signed Sex Contract by Ma Nithya Sadhananda

Funny, there was no mention of this incident at all in your article. Nothing about how her car wizzed by or anything. But, in your press conference, you, 'Swami' Nithyananda said that the car the sped by was just your mother. Now, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, was that your real biological mother or a 'mayi' mother? Sri Nithyananda, we all know what happens when you name some lady 'mayi'. My. My. Anyway, we're glad that you, Sri Nithyananda, captured your real, biological mother speeding off in the car in your secret surveillance camera. Now you can give the full, unedited video that proves that it really was your real, biological mother and not Ma Sadhananda to the police to prove your innocence. We're sure that the police will begin to believe your story about how she's really sick and re-cooperating in some hospital in Chennai because your healing powers have become worthless in your Bidadi Brothel.

Sri Nithyananda, just another small point in your press meet. You, 'Swami' Nithyananda, said that no one from your ashram has absconded from the law. That the CID Police Team made up some story about two of your ashramites running away from them and then leaked that 'lie' to the press just to confuse people. Very well. We believe you, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. Honest. Just simply manifest Sri Nithya Sadhananda (Aiyya) and Ms. Ragini Vallabhaneni, a.k.a. Ma Nithya Sachitananda, who both have nonbailable arrest warrants issued in their honor, and we'll believe you a hundred percent. No questions asked.

Well, 'Swami' Nithyananda. Looks like you learned a few things about secretly shooting videos. It's nice that a genuine Paramahamsa can learn new tricks from his own worldly experience. Hey, let's watch your video together, Sri Nithyananda, shall we?

Atrocity! Nithyananda Shoots the Police


Wow, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, those police officers were mighty aggressive. Why they wouldn't even let Swami Sachitananda interrupt them as much as he tried. Look, Sri Nithyananda, from 0:38 to 1:38, we counted 17 times Swami Sachitananda wouldn't let the police finish the sentence. And, as hard as Swami Schitananda physically blocked the Police Officer and would not let him advance, the Police Officer had the nerve to keep moving forward even though Swami Sachitananda was clearly invading his personal space. Just watch, the Police Officer had to move left then right, then left then right. Swami Sachitananda certainly earned his sheep dog credentials right then and there. What's the matter, Sri Nithyananda? Don't the police know who they are dealing with? Swami Sachitananda didn't rise in the ranks of the toxic chemical industry without learning a trick or two. He trained from the best of wolves. We love it how Swami Sachitananda just baits the questions for the camera, "Do not shout at me, sir, why are you shouting at ME!" Did he learn that from you, 'Swami' Nithyananda? Brilliant acting. Ditto for the "Why are you manhandling him, sir?" Planting the onus of guilt right into the question. Perfect.

And, speaking of manhandling, that must have been some manhandling tactics if we ever saw them. Just look, 'Swami' Nithyananda, while being manhandled Rishi Nithya Dayananda never dropped the camera. Mr. Rishi must have been holding that camera with the grip of death... and what a stud, he not only failed to drop the camera but still focused it on the police officer the whole incident. OK, there's one second where he lost focused, but then right back to shooting the police. Now that's the true work of a bona fide kshatriya (warrior). Sri Nithyananda, did you practice your special manhandling techniques on him?  Mr. Rishi must have trained for this day. And, look 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, the next picture has Mr. Rishi in a full arm cast looking very sad and in pain. Wow, that must have hurt a lot. Funny, even though you, Sri Nithyananda, can hear the police officer slap the camera, we never heard a single peep of discomfort coming from Rishi Nithya Dayananda. What discipline. But, then again, Sri Sachitananda was flapping his mouth, so there is a chance that we simply missed Mr. Rishi's moment of anguish.

But, boy, on 1:38, we cannot miss the pain he's in. Look, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, you even zoom in on that full arm caste. Looks like he'll be in limbo for months. And, such a long face. Is that due to his pain?, his acting?, or the fact that now he has to be interviewed by Swami Sachitananda? Oh, painful. He goes on to describe his arm... "the area has been sprang and badly bruised'. So, 'Swami' Nithyananda, is this your type of healing energy that you offer? It looks like when someone is in your energy field, they cannot feel pain at them moment, but they get hurt even worse, especially if a camera is rolling. Atrocity. Looks like a lot of real, genuine victims here.

OK, 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda, this looks like this has been a long day for just about everyone. We think we need to show something that's a little fun and light and has absolutely no relationship or bearing with today's incidents. Not at all. We thought we would close on a little action for our football fans, that's international football, OK, soccer, as the Yanks all know it by. Remember, there's nothing related about this video and the events we saw in your video. Nothing at all.

Sneaky Acting Pays Off After All


Follow your dharma. Use your common sense. Listen to your inner-conscience, and follow the Truth. Come out of this trap, and escape from this fake and fraudulent cult scam.

Special thanks to our super commenter, Anonymous, a.k.a. Ma Mark Jackson of Los Angeles, with a Comcast IP address of 67.188.196.# (Comcast Cable), operating in or near Fremont, using a Mac OS X 10.5, FireFox browser, screen resolution of 1440 x 900, and a color depth of 24 bits and who has political connections by claiming that her "Uncle is a serious high court judge in Chennai". Thanks for inspiring us to go forward to continue the battle against 'Paramahamsa' Nithyananda. You were a real savior.